AI-made — please help correct faster-whisper small int8 + clean-pass
A machine made this from the film's audio. Names, old slang and songs are where it slips. If you spot a mistake, send the line number and the right words below — every correction makes the next transcript better.
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00:01:10 #1 Reserving room well, what might your name be? Well the name might be McGinney, but it's not my name is Claude Davis
00:01:18 #2 Oh, mr. Davis. Yes indeed. Well, how do you do mr. Davis? My granddaughter Sally
00:01:23 #3 My granddaughter Ruth this indeed a great pleasure
00:01:26 #4 I'll take their trouble
00:01:28 #5 What I want is rooms with plenty of sunshine. I want plenty of fresh air and above all I want quiet
00:01:38 #6 You understand I want fire. Yes, so you'd be perfectly satisfied with the day
00:01:41 #7 I'm sure, all right, if I'm not you, here for me.
00:01:45 #8 Oh, uh, sweet sea, uh, sweet sea for Miss Dibbs.
00:01:51 #9 You happen to know by my name, you Tom Robin's Libby.
00:02:02 #10 Oh, yes, sir.
00:02:03 #11 He lives in one of those small cottage about a half mile down the beach.
00:02:06 #12 Yeah.
00:02:09 #13 Are you going to be here long? About a week.
00:02:11 #14 Maybe long.
00:02:12 #15 Oh, that's fine.
00:02:13 #16 Yeah, what's going on here?
00:02:15 #17 Grandpa, we knew those two boys were school.
00:02:19 #18 Yeah.
00:02:20 #19 Well, school's over now.
00:02:21 #20 Come on upstairs.
00:02:35 #21 The Davis family just registered.
00:02:37 #22 That splendid a couple of new faces for let it when it's
00:02:39 #23 facial time.
00:02:40 #24 It's facial time.
00:02:42 #25 Where do they hibernate?
00:02:43 #26 Sweet sea. Fine.
00:02:44 #27 The queen of the beauty parlor flies on the wings of time.
00:02:47 #28 My motto boy is never pan the pan that feeds you. Yeah, go easy.
00:02:52 #29 The old jents are tough customers.
00:02:53 #30 A man is as tough as his wife lets it be.
00:02:56 #31 Boy, you ought to know that sound.
00:02:57 #32 You've taken the count many times. Wow.
00:02:59 #33 Say, just a minute here.
00:03:18 #34 Here.
00:03:19 #35 Go back there.
00:03:21 #36 Somebody better do something before Uncle starts singing with him again.
00:03:24 #37 Why, here's a diet cat come to a hotel without being a noise.
00:03:27 #38 Good morning, good morning. Oh, I'm so sorry, I'm sorry.
00:03:30 #39 But Papa, you keep your nose away from keyholes.
00:03:33 #40 The eyes have it, but no nose, no nose.
00:03:35 #41 You might have broken my nose.
00:03:37 #42 That's right, I might have. Who knows? There's a nipple for you, isn't it?
00:03:40 #43 Say, who are you?
00:03:41 #44 Who am I? I'm the girl Paul revealed to keep the date with.
00:03:44 #45 You remember me? Of course you do.
00:03:46 #46 I suppose these are the young David sets.
00:03:49 #47 Right the first time.
00:03:51 #48 A house detective.
00:03:52 #49 Thanks for the visit.
00:03:54 #50 I am a greater and a bigger bargain than that.
00:03:56 #51 Somebody much more important.
00:03:57 #52 Somebody that stands between you and old Aves.
00:04:00 #53 Somebody...
00:04:01 #54 I can get.
00:04:02 #55 Wait a minute.
00:04:03 #56 Old Gold.
00:04:05 #57 Better than Gold.
00:04:06 #58 I am selling insurance against the ravages of fatigued time.
00:04:10 #59 Against the loss of that schoolgirl complexion.
00:04:13 #60 I furnish every woman with the weapons to defeat her greatest enemies. I wish...
00:04:17 #61 I wish you to retire at Barclay.
00:04:19 #62 I never accept last-minute invitations.
00:04:21 #63 I insist.
00:04:22 #64 I'm the bringer of good news!
00:04:24 #65 A boat-legger!
00:04:25 #66 Better than that!
00:04:26 #67 I am Beauty's Handmaiden.
00:04:28 #68 I am the representative of the Hotel Beauty Paula.
00:04:31 #69 I know I don't look it, but that's my story,
00:04:33 #70 and I'm going to stick to it.
00:04:34 #71 A faith-lifter!
00:04:36 #72 The Ardmore Hotel Boat...
00:04:39 #73 of the most modern and completely equipped
00:04:41 #74 beauty shop west of the Rockies.
00:04:42 #75 Every device known to science for the preservation...
00:04:45 #76 I will tell the owner and the manager.
00:04:46 #77 Here, here, come here.
00:04:47 #78 you save your upper and lower diaphragm.
00:04:49 #79 You may need your wind and a storm.
00:04:51 #80 And here, this is for you.
00:04:52 #81 What? No galoshes?
00:04:53 #82 How does a tune go?
00:04:55 #83 Can you sing it?
00:04:56 #84 Can I sing it?
00:04:58 #85 Can I sing it, Papa?
00:04:59 #86 Oh, can I sing it, Papa?
00:05:04 #87 Come on, girls, draw up a chair.
00:05:06 #88 Letty's gonna play you across the board.
00:05:08 #89 Come at me and call.
00:05:27 #90 I got so great to get even with.
00:05:35 #91 I stood in hard and got a job.
00:05:39 #92 It was quite enough.
00:06:26 #93 Their husband.
00:06:27 #94 Oh, I never could make it.
00:07:37 #95 Hi-ho, that's the way it is in this world.
00:07:38 #96 Here today and in Hock tomorrow.
00:07:40 #97 Woman, where do you leave?
00:07:41 #98 Papa, will you stop teasing?
00:07:42 #99 You see, our beauty shop makes it special, dear.
00:07:44 #100 But do you own your own shop?
00:07:45 #101 No, I just work there on commission.
00:07:47 #102 You see, every time I bring in two new faces,
00:07:48 #103 I get a facial free.
00:07:50 #104 My husband doesn't make a very big sale.
00:07:51 #105 Then we are not interested in your private affair.
00:07:53 #106 Array for cough drop.
00:07:54 #107 You see, some people collect coupons,
00:07:56 #108 other stamps, and some collect children. But me?
00:07:58 #109 I am a facial fiend.
00:07:59 #110 I'm just crazy about having my pan pampered with.
00:08:02 #111 Doesn't your face crack under the strain?
00:08:03 #112 What of it? I can't help it. I've got to have it.
00:08:06 #113 It's just got me. I've got to have enough facials all summer
00:08:08 #114 to last me all winter when the hotel is closed.
00:08:10 #115 Poor thing. Can't you break yourself with a habit?
00:08:13 #116 We're big-hearted. We'll invest a couple of faces.
00:08:15 #117 You will not. You'll have nothing to do with that maniac.
00:08:17 #118 Say, listen here, Papa.
00:08:19 #119 A guy with a face like yours becomes a national calamity.
00:08:22 #120 You know, a couple of treatments wouldn't do you any harm.
00:08:26 #121 Woman, will you leave?
00:08:28 #122 Look here. Look there.
00:08:29 #123 You see there? Look, it's coming out in handfuls.
00:08:31 #124 Do you see it? See that?
00:08:32 #125 Oh, woman. If you...
00:08:34 #126 If you don't do something about it soon,
00:08:36 #127 the flies will be using your head for a skating rink.
00:08:38 #128 Oh, will you? Please, get out!
00:08:40 #129 Our special Egyptian scene treatment
00:08:42 #130 has to do you good. Relax the nerves.
00:08:44 #131 Stimulate the liver. Grow hair.
00:08:46 #132 Let me see your bald spot. It fascinates me.
00:08:48 #133 Oh, Sally, look. The woman is way...
00:08:49 #134 I've got to see your bald spot. It fascinates me.
00:08:51 #135 Just one look at it.
00:08:53 #136 Uh-huh. Just as I thought. You need a toupee.
00:08:55 #137 I'll never have a toupee.
00:08:57 #138 You need a toupee.
00:08:58 #139 I'll make an appointment with you tomorrow morning.
00:09:02 #140 We'll be there in person, not a moving pick.
00:09:05 #141 And Papa, don't forget, I'll get you yet.
00:09:12 #142 Oh, and I told that clerk I wanted quiet rooms.
00:09:19 #143 Hello. Get me the manager. Get me the clerk.
00:09:26 #144 Hello?
00:09:28 #145 Look here, what do you mean by allowing that beauty parlor maniac
00:09:31 #146 to come up here and chase me all over my rooms.
00:09:34 #147 Wait, this isn't a hotel.
00:09:37 #148 This is a madhouse.
00:09:38 #149 Now, adjust a moment, Mr. Davis.
00:09:39 #150 I'll send a young man up to adjust any complaints you may have.
00:09:43 #151 I don't want to see any young man.
00:09:45 #152 I tell you, I am checking out.
00:09:55 #153 Back in the house could a woman be so neglectful.
00:10:35 #154 Dear Tom, girls and I are just back from Europe.
00:10:39 #155 Coming to beach, see you and bride in few days.
00:10:44 #156 Uncle Claude. Four, six, five.
00:10:59 #157 Yes.
00:11:02 #158 Hello?
00:11:05 #159 Hello, Hotel?
00:11:06 #160 I want to speak to Mrs. Tom Robbins.
00:11:11 #161 Try the beauty shop.
00:11:15 #162 Hello?
00:11:18 #163 I want to speak to Mrs. Tom Robbins.
00:11:20 #164 Just a moment, please.
00:11:33 #165 Oh, Mrs. Robbins? Yeah?
00:11:35 #166 A telephone for you.
00:11:36 #167 Call her, call her.
00:11:37 #168 I'll bring it in to you.
00:11:44 #169 Hello?
00:11:45 #170 Isn't it, Mrs. Robbins?
00:11:47 #171 Oh, yeah?
00:11:47 #172 Well, this is Mr. Robbins.
00:11:49 #173 Yeah?
00:11:50 #174 Say, what's the idea of leaving this place looking like a pigpen?
00:11:54 #175 You not only do that, but you throw my telegrams all around the floor
00:11:57 #176 in the hope that I'll starve to death while I'm looking for them.
00:12:01 #177 That telegram was from Uncle Claude, and he's coming here.
00:12:04 #178 He may even be in a hotel now.
00:12:07 #179 And you know I wanted you to make a good impression on him.
00:12:09 #180 If he doesn't think that I've married a real domestic little homemaker,
00:12:13 #181 well, he'll never give us a cent.
00:12:15 #182 Oh Tom, I'm awfully sorry.
00:12:16 #183 I didn't know that telegram was from Uncle Claude.
00:12:19 #184 Oh dear, don't you worry darling, I'll make an impression on you all right.
00:12:23 #185 I can't fail to make an impression on him.
00:12:26 #186 Girl, get me out of here will you?
00:12:28 #187 I've got to get over it right away to my uncle, to our kin and madam, my embarrassment.
00:13:16 #188 I was just getting a nose full of your dinner as long as I can't get a mouthful of my own.
00:13:20 #189 Oh you poor boy, haven't you eaten yet?
00:13:23 #190 No, we have at our house, there's a lot of bologna.
00:13:26 #191 That's a shame.
00:13:28 #192 You know, let, let he starving need a death.
00:13:31 #193 Well, you stay here and have dinner with Harry and me.
00:13:34 #194 That is, if he ever shows up.
00:13:37 #195 Great. Funny, isn't it?
00:13:45 #196 You're always waiting for your husband to come home,
00:13:47 #197 and I'm always waiting for my wife.
00:13:51 #198 Sometimes they're both going to show up on time,
00:13:56 #199 and then we can start a quartet.
00:13:58 #200 Well, I don't see anything so funny and always waiting.
00:14:01 #201 Some... some wise guy once said,
00:14:06 #202 people marry their opposites.
00:14:11 #203 I guess that's right.
00:14:12 #204 I wonder what Uncle Claude will think of Letty.
00:14:18 #205 You're going to inherit a lot of money from him someday, aren't you?
00:14:26 #206 Hmm.
00:14:28 #207 Not if he finds out I married a grocery delivery wagon.
00:14:32 #208 Anybody home?
00:14:51 #209 Marriage to you would be just like a towel-dote dinner.
00:15:21 #210 Everything would be ready and waiting.
00:15:24 #211 That's too much compliment for one dinner.
00:15:27 #212 Like to knit?
00:15:31 #213 I make all of my tents and sweaters,
00:15:33 #214 and I make all my own clothes.
00:15:35 #215 Make all your own clothes?
00:15:37 #216 Gee, that's smart.
00:15:40 #217 All that he ever made for me was trouble.
00:15:55 #218 Uncle Claude, come in.
00:16:16 #219 Greetings, you young ratty.
00:16:18 #220 You didn't expect me so soon, did you?
00:16:20 #221 No.
00:16:22 #222 Well, Mrs. Rime.
00:16:26 #223 I'm Tommy's Uncle Claude.
00:16:33 #224 Well, uncle, you see, my wife, 9-9.
00:16:36 #225 What a nice night.
00:16:37 #226 I said that no relative of mine
00:16:49 #227 would ever live in a pig pen like that.
00:16:52 #228 Well, you see, my wife is...
00:16:56 #229 She is not my wife.
00:17:11 #230 This, two laces.
00:17:31 #231 I've been in a couple of days, my son.
00:17:51 #232 So whatever it's going to be.
00:18:07 #233 You over here where you don't belong?
00:18:32 #234 Do you know this assassin?
00:18:34 #235 Why, there's my old...
00:18:36 #236 Get rid of this woman at once.
00:18:43 #237 What are you, my official bouncer?
00:18:45 #238 I thought you said the time got married.
00:18:49 #239 Well, you see that...
00:18:51 #240 Well, we've been neighbors for years.
00:18:52 #241 Oh, so it's you that lives next door.
00:18:55 #242 Yes, would you like to dispossess me?
00:18:57 #243 Woman, go back to your pigpen where you belong.
00:19:00 #244 Uh-huh. You've been snooping around my cottage.
00:19:03 #245 Listen here, young man, if I catch you hanging around there again,
00:19:06 #246 Mama certainly is gonna whip Papa.
00:19:09 #247 Say, what ales you? Are you reducing?
00:19:12 #248 You see, this is my uncle Claude.
00:19:15 #249 I've spoken to you about him often.
00:19:17 #250 Mr. Davis, president of the International Cats and Potato Company.
00:19:21 #251 and tomato company.
00:19:22 #252 Oh gee, I'm sorry.
00:19:24 #253 Oh, Wormert, will you leave?
00:19:26 #254 Oh, Uncle Claude, can you ever, will you have you ever...
00:19:30 #255 Oh, if my husband had only told me.
00:19:33 #256 Tom, why didn't you?
00:19:35 #257 Oh, you see, Uncle Claude, her husband is a friend of yours.
00:19:40 #258 He's a big tomato sauce man from...
00:19:45 #259 Say, what are you raving about?
00:19:46 #260 You're not a big tomato and sauce man from...
00:19:50 #261 But, oh, Uncle Todd, I'm so sorry.
00:19:52 #262 Oh, hold on.
00:19:53 #263 I'm going to get out of here.
00:19:55 #264 Now, Uncle Todd, now you must get out of here.
00:19:58 #265 Can you take the air?
00:19:59 #266 What do you think I am, a windmill?
00:20:01 #267 Oh, I'll be back in a minute.
00:20:14 #268 Now, my dear, I'm sorry, but I've got to be going.
00:20:17 #269 And, my dear, take my advice and don't become intimate
00:20:22 #270 with that terrible woman.
00:20:25 #271 If Tom had ever married a creature like that.
00:20:30 #272 Now, what's this all about? What did you do to him?
00:20:41 #273 I didn't have the slightest idea who he was.
00:20:44 #274 I only knew him to be one of those rich new arrivals.
00:20:47 #275 So I went up into his suite and I pulled some of that high-pressure sales method of mine on him.
00:20:52 #276 Good night. You fix my future now.
00:20:55 #277 I'm sorry. Dreadfully sorry.
00:20:58 #278 Sorry? I knew you'd keep on clowning like this till something happened.
00:21:05 #279 Tom, honestly, I wouldn't have had this happen, Fred.
00:21:09 #280 I wouldn't have had this happen for anything in the world.
00:21:12 #281 Stop acting.
00:21:13 #282 You're getting all set now to pull that one about the busy day
00:21:16 #283 or feeling sorry for the tramp.
00:21:17 #284 No, no, don't.
00:21:18 #285 No, I should have quit you long ago.
00:21:21 #286 Anyway, before this thing happened, I'm through.
00:21:31 #287 My dear, thank you.
00:21:33 #288 I'm so glad that Tom married a nice little girl like you.
00:21:37 #289 I'm going to like you very much, my dear.
00:21:38 #290 And when Uncle Claude says he likes you, he says it with cash.
00:21:43 #291 Bye, my dear.
00:21:45 #292 Goodbye, Uncle Claude.
00:21:54 #293 I'm away from that woman.
00:22:03 #294 Leaving so soon, Uncle?
00:22:04 #295 Yeah, yeah.
00:22:05 #296 Well, I'll walk out of the way with you.
00:22:06 #297 Look, yes, arm.
00:22:08 #298 If you would ever marry the woman like that tall creature,
00:22:11 #299 you'd never get a cent of my money.
00:22:13 #300 Well, being married to her would be hard on me, wouldn't it? Hard.
00:22:17 #301 It'd be fatal to you or anybody else.
00:22:20 #302 I'll walk to the pier with you.
00:22:22 #303 Isn't very polite to start reading the minutes you're holding.
00:22:28 #304 I'm trying to find a little good news,
00:22:30 #305 a nice murder or something, a little comedy relief
00:22:32 #306 for the home fire blues you sing.
00:22:38 #307 Stop hiding behind that paper.
00:22:40 #308 Hiding from you? Impossible.
00:22:43 #309 I told you when I married you that I couldn't cook
00:22:45 #310 and I don't like housework.
00:22:47 #311 Yeah, well, I found that out.
00:22:48 #312 You're just lazy.
00:22:49 #313 Lazy, I am not.
00:22:50 #314 I'd work like a dog if I had something artistic to do.
00:22:53 #315 Something befitting a delicate,
00:22:55 #316 high-strung, sensitive personality like mine.
00:22:58 #317 Sensitive?
00:22:59 #318 Ha-ha!
00:23:00 #319 Sensitive, ha-ha!
00:23:02 #320 If I could bob my hair and put a band door around it
00:23:04 #321 and a couple of yards of cheesecloth around here
00:23:06 #322 to go in for Greek dancing.
00:23:07 #323 Yeah, well, suppose you start expressing yourself
00:23:10 #324 by putting on an apron and buying some frankfudders
00:23:12 #325 and doing a little Greek cooking.
00:23:14 #326 Are you broadcasting?
00:23:15 #327 I'm listening.
00:23:16 #328 I warn you, I'll leave you.
00:23:19 #329 What I need is the kind of a life
00:23:20 #330 that will bring back my radio voice.
00:23:23 #331 Plenty of rest and good food and regularity of.
00:23:26 #332 Yes, fresh air and long walks and sunshine.
00:23:30 #333 You don't want a wife.
00:23:31 #334 You want a sanitarium.
00:23:34 #335 That's it.
00:23:38 #336 Am I blue?
00:23:40 #337 Da, da, da.
00:23:52 #338 You might try talking to your wife occasionally.
00:23:54 #339 When? During intermission?
00:23:57 #340 Oh.
00:23:59 #341 Why did I ever marry you?
00:24:01 #342 For revenge, I guess, and maybe you sure got it.
00:24:04 #343 Through that door into her pots and pans.
00:24:18 #344 You should have married a kitchen stove.
00:24:21 #345 That's hot.
00:24:22 #346 No more wise cracks from the broken crockery.
00:24:25 #347 Say, I'll wise crack just as much as I want.
00:24:27 #348 You're going to walk?
00:24:28 #349 Don't walk it out of here.
00:24:29 #350 Slam the door as you go out.
00:24:52 #351 I'm not worried.
00:24:54 #352 I'm just exhausted.
00:24:56 #353 Letty and I just had another battle.
00:25:03 #354 You know, Grace, my wife doesn't understand me.
00:25:08 #355 That's a shame.
00:25:12 #356 Now, if I was only married to someone like you, Grace, dear,
00:25:22 #357 did anybody ever tell you you had lovely hands?
00:25:26 #358 Not since I've been married.
00:25:34 #359 I didn't know you were home, Harry.
00:25:36 #360 I'll send you a telegram the next time.
00:25:38 #361 Do you suppose he saw us holding hands?
00:25:47 #362 I don't know. And I don't care if he did.
00:25:50 #363 The brute.
00:26:05 #364 Pull down the drawbridge and enter the bucks away on a hunting trip.
00:26:08 #365 Sit down.
00:26:10 #366 Hey, Letty.
00:26:12 #367 Would you believe me if I said that my wife didn't understand me?
00:26:16 #368 Oh, that's too bad.
00:26:17 #369 Why don't you stay home nights and tell her something about yourself?
00:26:20 #370 No, if she spent half as much time on her face
00:26:23 #371 as she did her veal cutlet while I'd relish it.
00:26:26 #372 Are you speaking of the lady or the cutlet?
00:26:29 #373 Imagine how I feel when I come home nights and find her looking like the follies of 1910.
00:26:34 #374 It takes all the pep out of me.
00:26:36 #375 Now with you, Ledy, it's different, I...
00:26:39 #376 Oh, Harry, you're killing me.
00:26:41 #377 Yeah, you're someone of a killer yourself.
00:26:45 #378 Harry, I wish Tommy'd get a suit like yours.
00:26:48 #379 Oh, you like the suit?
00:26:50 #380 Soft, creepy material. Get the bare suggestion of the figure.
00:26:54 #381 It's a latest shriek from London.
00:26:56 #382 It's a scream, all right.
00:26:58 #383 I like the little digitalis around the majazbo here.
00:27:01 #384 It's really stunning.
00:27:03 #385 You know, Lady, you have beautiful, slender, graceful hands.
00:27:06 #386 Do you really think so?
00:27:08 #387 Yeah. Grace's hands are all thumbs, mostly down.
00:27:12 #388 Eric, I'd like to speak to you outside a minute.
00:27:23 #389 All right, Tom.
00:27:25 #390 What's the idea of making love to my wife?
00:27:38 #391 That wasn't love. That was conversation.
00:27:40 #392 Well, when you had to hold her hands,
00:27:42 #393 what were you describing, a wrestling match?
00:27:44 #394 I'm a nervous temperament.
00:27:46 #395 Well, you keep your nervous temperament away from my wife.
00:27:48 #396 Yeah? Where were you?
00:27:50 #397 I was... I was practicing voice culture.
00:27:54 #398 Well, since when is my home a rehearsal hall?
00:27:57 #399 You wouldn't know home if you saw one.
00:28:00 #400 Yeah? Well, you come on down by the ocean.
00:28:02 #401 I want to talk to you.
00:28:03 #402 Yeah? Yeah.
00:28:06 #403 Sure. You're as nervous as a cat.
00:28:26 #404 Grace, I am one jump ahead of a falcon.
00:28:28 #405 One jump ahead of a fit.
00:28:35 #406 Yourself, buddy.
00:28:36 #407 Calm yourself.
00:28:37 #408 Tell me what happened.
00:28:39 #409 Listen, Harry was in here a minute ago,
00:28:40 #410 and he was telling me.
00:28:41 #411 He was telling me what pretty hands I have.
00:28:43 #412 Oh, really?
00:28:46 #413 And Tommy got terribly jealous.
00:28:47 #414 Jealous?
00:28:48 #415 Tom jealous of Harry?
00:28:50 #416 Oh, how perfectly ridiculous.
00:28:53 #417 Oh, I don't know about that.
00:28:56 #418 Tommy admires me very much.
00:28:58 #419 But listen here, from what I can gather,
00:29:00 #420 Harry is extremely jealous of Tommy.
00:29:03 #421 You don't say so.
00:29:06 #422 Isn't that ridiculous?
00:29:11 #423 Are they really very angry?
00:29:12 #424 Angry? They've gone down the beach now to have it out.
00:29:15 #425 How would they kill each other?
00:29:18 #426 Boy, wouldn't that be awful?
00:29:20 #427 Oh, and Harry's the only husband I've got.
00:29:24 #428 Well, Tom is no leading man.
00:29:27 #429 But believe me, he is a comfort around the house.
00:29:29 #430 You all right, Tommy, darling?
00:29:44 #431 Are you all right, dear?
00:29:46 #432 Certainly we're all right. Aren't we, Tom? Perfect.
00:29:49 #433 Tom and I have just come to a big decision, haven't we, Tom?
00:29:52 #434 Yes indeed we have.
00:29:53 #435 You tell them, Tom.
00:29:57 #436 You tell them and I'll pat my foot.
00:29:59 #437 Well, well, you see the fact is that...
00:30:01 #438 Yes, it certainly is.
00:30:03 #439 Yes, it certainly is. What is it?
00:30:05 #440 A vodka, like, go ahead and spill it.
00:30:07 #441 Yes, let's have it.
00:30:08 #442 Well, to get right to the point, we figured we'd exchange wives.
00:30:14 #443 Yes, precisely.
00:30:16 #444 What?
00:30:17 #445 Well, you're both crazy.
00:30:18 #446 Well, you see, Tom figured that Grace was such a good cook
00:30:21 #447 and he's such a food hound that, yes, and Harry figured that,
00:30:24 #448 as long as he likes to make whoopee and let him invent it.
00:30:28 #449 And so you two masterminds decided that you had both married
00:30:31 #450 the wrong girl.
00:30:32 #451 And you'd remedy the mistake by switching.
00:30:34 #452 Well, that's about it.
00:30:36 #453 That's exactly it.
00:30:37 #454 Well, out of all the gals, they don't need a nerve tonic.
00:30:40 #455 That's a cinch.
00:30:41 #456 Well, now understand, girls.
00:30:42 #457 We're not going to really, uh, oh, no, we won't really.
00:30:46 #458 Oh, you mean you won't, really?
00:30:51 #459 You won't, really?
00:30:53 #460 No.
00:30:54 #461 Not really? No.
00:30:56 #462 I think.
00:30:57 #463 Really?
00:30:58 #464 So we girls are just taking on probation, so to speak.
00:31:02 #465 So you two fellows are figuring it all out,
00:31:04 #466 and you're going to give us the air.
00:31:06 #467 Refined air, ozone.
00:31:07 #468 Well, I think it's outrageous and disgusting.
00:31:11 #469 Whose idea was this anyway?
00:31:15 #470 Well, we thought that...
00:31:16 #471 uh, it was a kind of a... collaboration.
00:31:19 #472 I wrote the words and he wrote the music.
00:31:22 #473 Oh, I see. It took two heads to hammer this idea out.
00:31:26 #474 Say, Grace, step into my office, will you?
00:31:30 #475 We'll talk this thing over.
00:31:31 #476 After all, you don't think we should...
00:31:38 #477 Keep calm, keep calm.
00:31:40 #478 I know, but I've never swapped wives before in either of you.
00:31:43 #479 Keep cool, Tommy, keep cool.
00:31:45 #480 I'm cool, all right.
00:31:49 #481 Oh, now, Letty, you're not gonna really let them.
00:31:51 #482 Listen, can't you see if they really want to get rid of us,
00:31:53 #483 we can't do anything else but let them?
00:31:56 #484 But supposing after we exchanged for a while,
00:31:58 #485 Harry would prefer you.
00:32:00 #486 Don't worry.
00:32:01 #487 I never purchase goods by sample.
00:32:04 #488 Well, that's the relief.
00:32:05 #489 Would you want Tommy as a permanent institution?
00:32:08 #490 I should say not.
00:32:10 #491 Well, I don't want that giraffe that belongs to you.
00:32:13 #492 Well, well anyway, I'm afraid, oh, I just couldn't...
00:32:16 #493 Nonsense! This is the chance of a lifetime
00:32:18 #494 to teach them such a lesson
00:32:19 #495 that they'll eat out of our hands forever after.
00:32:21 #496 How?
00:32:22 #497 Listen, Tommy's always bawling me out about being a rotten cook and housekeeper.
00:32:26 #498 You take him for a week and stuff him with food till he cries for help.
00:32:30 #499 Say, that's not a bad idea.
00:32:32 #500 Harry's always bawling you out about not dressing well, sitting home and tending to the house.
00:32:36 #501 I'll take him for a week.
00:32:38 #502 Oh boy, how I'll take him.
00:32:40 #503 I'll give him so much excitement and action that he'll crawl back to you on his hands
00:32:44 #504 and knees.
00:32:45 #505 Matty, you're a genius.
00:32:48 #506 Oh, you're generous.
00:32:50 #507 What do you say?
00:32:51 #508 I'm with you.
00:32:52 #509 OK, baby.
00:32:53 #510 Oh, this is going to be sweet.
00:32:57 #511 Come on now.
00:33:11 #512 We've decided.
00:33:13 #513 Harry, you come over here with me for a week.
00:33:16 #514 And Tommy, you go over there with Grace.
00:33:21 #515 You mean for a week?
00:33:23 #516 For a week?
00:33:24 #517 We can get a divorce later.
00:33:26 #518 Grace and I are not going to take any serious steps
00:33:28 #519 as that until we're perfectly sure that she wants Tommy
00:33:31 #520 and I want you and a week trial will give us all the information we need.
00:33:36 #521 Undoubtedly positively absolutely good.
00:33:42 #522 Is it a bargain it's more than a bargain it's a fire sale. Well I'm game if you are
00:33:48 #523 your latchkey your latchkey Harry make it snappy and you better be good.
00:34:05 #524 I'm going to pack I'll be right back. When do we eat Tom still packing
00:35:14 #525 Yep. He's in.
00:35:24 #526 Uh-huh.
00:35:27 #527 I feel, Tom.
00:35:31 #528 Fine. How do you feel?
00:35:33 #529 Hail and warmer.
00:35:34 #530 Well, let's go.
00:35:35 #531 Let's go.
00:35:36 #532 Well, here we are.
00:35:46 #533 Yeah, here they are. The two of us.
00:35:47 #534 You mean the four of us. Let's do a menu, eh?
00:35:49 #535 Right. Choose your partners.
00:35:51 #536 Well, Tommy, we better get started.
00:35:56 #537 Started? He's way ahead of you and leading the way.
00:35:59 #538 Remember, early to bed and no play makes Jack and Doe boy.
00:36:03 #539 So long, Letty.
00:36:07 #540 I know, I know.
00:36:50 #541 We always have roast beef Thursday.
00:36:52 #542 Wednesday lamb chops, Tuesday steak, Monday hash.
00:36:57 #543 You don't need a calendar in this house.
00:37:00 #544 You can smell the days.
00:37:02 #545 Well, for dessert we have the lovely...
00:37:05 #546 The beef lemon pie.
00:37:07 #547 I know.
00:37:08 #548 We always have lemon pie Thursday.
00:37:10 #549 Wednesday rice pudding, Tuesday bread pudding,
00:37:14 #550 Tuesday bread pudding.
00:37:17 #551 Monday apple pie and whipped cream.
00:37:23 #552 Sunday applesauce.
00:37:25 #553 Is mama's new papa one his dinner?
00:37:32 #554 I'm too tired to eat, Lennie.
00:37:34 #555 Well, come on in and sit down,
00:37:35 #556 and I'll give you nothing but service.
00:37:37 #557 Nothing but service.
00:37:38 #558 I don't want anything to eat.
00:37:39 #559 Oh, but you'll need plenty of food before morning
00:37:42 #560 because we're going out on a wild party.
00:37:44 #561 What, again tonight?
00:37:45 #562 Wow.
00:37:46 #563 Lennie, if you ever have a kid, it'll be an hour car conductor.
00:37:48 #564 Yes, I want something.
00:37:49 #565 Coffee. Strong and flack.
00:37:51 #566 Boy, you've got it right there, strong and black,
00:37:53 #567 aged in the pots since yesterday morning.
00:37:55 #568 Oh, our guy doesn't know when he's well off.
00:37:57 #569 How do they sleep, then eat?
00:37:58 #570 Oh, please go away and let me sleep.
00:38:01 #571 Honey, please, I can do without that.
00:38:02 #572 Please, I'm very...
00:38:05 #573 Well, what kind of fish will you have?
00:38:07 #574 Salmon Sardines or tuna?
00:38:09 #575 Name your can, I have the brand.
00:38:12 #576 How's your appetite?
00:38:13 #577 I don't need any appetite.
00:38:14 #578 I'm starved already, but I'm too tired to eat.
00:38:16 #579 Now, there's a condition for you.
00:38:18 #580 Well, you might be in a worse condition.
00:38:20 #581 You might have to remain.
00:38:22 #582 Well, probably it for me to force a man to eat if you don't want to eat.
00:38:25 #583 All right, that's your business. It's there for you.
00:38:27 #584 Use your own judgment.
00:38:28 #585 I wish I had my own.
00:38:41 #586 Hello, operator.
00:39:04 #587 Give me Beachwood 4852. Yeah.
00:39:13 #588 Hello, Grace. This is Harry.
00:39:14 #589 Listen, honey, please let me come home. Please, will you?
00:39:17 #590 This game over here's got me on my heels.
00:39:19 #591 I'm collapsing.
00:39:20 #592 She's had me out every night, all night.
00:39:22 #593 And when she can't find a party to go to, well, she has one here.
00:39:25 #594 Honey, please let me come home. I'll be good.
00:39:27 #595 I'll come home for supper every night.
00:39:28 #596 How have you been, honey?
00:39:30 #597 I've been fine, and listen here, let me tell you something.
00:39:33 #598 You made your bed, and you can lie in it.
00:39:35 #599 Tom and I are getting along very well,
00:39:38 #600 and we're very, very happy.
00:39:40 #601 And he enjoys eating my cooking, and just as long
00:39:42 #602 as he enjoys eating it, he can eat it.
00:39:45 #603 Well, but Grace, Liz, Grace, hello?
00:39:49 #604 Hello, Grace?
00:39:50 #605 Say, listen, don't you hang up on me.
00:40:05 #606 That isn't the phone.
00:40:06 #607 It's the doorbell.
00:40:10 #608 I was just going.
00:40:12 #609 Oh, I'm sorry to have kept you waiting, but I was in the backyard bathing.
00:40:15 #610 I mean bathing the nasty sturtion.
00:40:17 #611 Oh, I came over to tell you that my husband's been called out of town suddenly,
00:40:21 #612 and I'm giving a party over at my cottage.
00:40:23 #613 Everybody's coming.
00:40:25 #614 You and Harry must stay shown.
00:40:28 #615 Well, of course we will.
00:40:31 #616 Harry, a door's party.
00:40:33 #617 When do you want it?
00:40:34 #618 The sooner the quicker.
00:40:34 #619 All right, we'll slip on the top step and be right over.
00:40:37 #620 All right, baby.
00:40:38 #621 I'll see you later. Bye-bye.
00:40:39 #622 Goodbye.
00:40:41 #623 I'm not going to go to parties.
00:40:43 #624 I'm not going to spend my life in a taxi.
00:40:45 #625 Are you going to dress or am I going to dress you?
00:40:48 #626 Please, let me go.
00:40:50 #627 This way to the soup and fish.
00:40:51 #628 Let me stay at home tonight.
00:40:57 #629 You stay here and you get dressed.
00:40:59 #630 My clothes are in the kitchen.
00:41:01 #631 I'll go get them.
00:41:26 #632 Do you have a match?
00:41:28 #633 No, but my sister has a lighter.
00:41:31 #634 You can't clean your fingernails with a lighter.
00:41:36 #635 Haven't we met someplace before?
00:41:38 #636 Don't you girls know Mrs. Lipson?
00:41:40 #637 Well, you should know her.
00:41:43 #638 She's giving a party tonight.
00:41:45 #639 And when she gives, sister, how she gives.
00:41:48 #640 I'm quite sure we don't know her, but perhaps we ought to.
00:41:52 #641 I think we should.
00:41:54 #642 Here, here, here.
00:41:56 #643 Hey, what, what, what's going on here?
00:41:58 #644 Well, Pop, these are some old friends of ours.
00:42:01 #645 Yes, Grandpa.
00:42:03 #646 These are some more boys we knew at school.
00:42:05 #647 Oh, I see.
00:42:07 #648 Yeah, well, school is still out.
00:42:09 #649 But Grandpa, they invited us to a party tonight over at Mrs. Dipster.
00:42:14 #650 Dipster?
00:42:16 #651 No.
00:42:18 #652 No woman with a name like that could give a decent party.
00:42:22 #653 Besides, I'm going to call on my nephew Tom Robbins and you two girls are going with me.
00:42:27 #654 What do you know about that?
00:42:29 #655 Two shooting stars and all...
00:42:37 #656 I don't see any shooting stars.
00:42:43 #657 I'm going to see any stars at all.
00:42:48 #658 The party's off.
00:42:49 #659 Mrs. Ipser's husband didn't get out of town.
00:42:55 #660 Isn't that too bad?
00:42:56 #661 Yeah, well, that's great.
00:42:57 #662 I can get some sleep now.
00:42:58 #663 Oh, don't be silly, Harry.
00:42:59 #664 There's other places to go.
00:43:00 #665 Yeah, well, there's one place you can go,
00:43:02 #666 and you won't need me for an escort.
00:43:03 #667 Oh, Harry.
00:43:04 #668 Don't be silly, Letty.
00:43:05 #669 I'm not going to get in this straight jacket again.
00:43:07 #670 I wouldn't go out tonight for anything.
00:43:09 #671 Well, their party was called off.
00:43:11 #672 So we all boxed over here.
00:43:38 #673 Well, come in.
00:43:39 #674 I'm glad you came.
00:43:40 #675 Mrs. Lowe's home, of course.
00:43:41 #676 I see you brought your banjos.
00:43:43 #677 I see you brought your banjos with you, boys. Go ahead and tune up.
00:43:46 #678 Follow me to the party.
00:43:47 #679 Well, girls, park yourselves around here and make yourselves at home with you.
00:43:50 #680 Find ice in the icebox and plenty of ale in the ginger ale.
00:43:53 #681 I'll go out and bring out the life of the party.
00:43:55 #682 What is this?
00:43:56 #683 I'm gonna have a smoke. Get out there, boys.
00:43:59 #684 Are you gonna get up and get dressed,
00:44:08 #685 or must I knock you unconscious and dress you?
00:44:11 #686 Oh, the day I let pray somebody should have poisoned me.
00:44:14 #687 I never thought of that, but it's a good idea.
00:44:17 #688 I have an idea.
00:44:19 #689 Will Sinai do?
00:44:21 #690 Or do you prefer potassium?
00:44:23 #691 Ah!
00:44:24 #692 I am!
00:44:25 #693 Where's Harry?
00:44:31 #694 As soon as he finds his false teeth!
00:44:37 #695 Say, Letty, will you do something?
00:44:39 #696 Sure, I imitate wild birds and beasts of the forest.
00:44:42 #697 My first imitation will be that of a wild eyelash.
00:44:44 #698 Wild, wild, wild, wild, wild.
00:44:48 #699 Do you know my strongest weakness?
00:44:50 #700 No, I mean the song play it.
00:44:52 #701 Every psychoanalyst that's analyzing
00:45:06 #702 Told me I would never, never fall in love
00:45:12 #703 Say your mental strength is most surprising
00:45:18 #704 They thought I was a sandal
00:45:22 #705 But I fooled a...
00:46:02 #706 It's all for candy
00:46:04 #707 It's getting no better fast
00:47:20 #708 I better call a doctor
00:47:22 #709 Say if you don't stop annoying me, you're going to have to call a doctor for yourself
00:47:34 #710 The Gloom Chaser!
00:47:38 #711 Get hot, boys, get hot!
00:47:39 #712 You're one sweet little...
00:47:51 #713 ...never, never tell me no.
00:47:58 #714 Buffy, fof, fof, fof, but oh...
00:48:00 #715 You take away my brandy to death.
00:48:06 #716 No, baby, never, never let me go.
00:48:09 #717 Let's do it, though!
00:48:10 #718 Why, you got dozens of cousins and dozens of aunts...
00:48:14 #719 ...relatives by the score.
00:48:17 #720 Write them and bite them and give them a chance...
00:48:19 #721 I come around to, but I'll indeed load a bag.
00:48:23 #722 You're one sweet little yes.
00:48:26 #723 Me doors plucking, then that old cold dress.
00:48:28 #724 Oh, baby, never, never let me go. That's it.
00:48:32 #725 How about a glass of hot water?
00:48:42 #726 Fine.
00:48:43 #727 Make it scalding and throw it at yourself.
00:48:46 #728 Oh, now just a nice glass of hot water
00:48:48 #729 with a little soda in it.
00:48:50 #730 And a cherry.
00:48:51 #731 Give me liberty or give me death.
00:48:54 #732 You're enough to drive a man screwy.
00:48:56 #733 Why, Tom, where are you going?
00:48:59 #734 Ice skating. The bull.
00:49:19 #735 We're pinched.
00:49:20 #736 Please let me come back.
00:49:32 #737 That woman's driving me crazy.
00:49:33 #738 Now you made your bed.
00:49:34 #739 Now you eat it.
00:49:35 #740 I'll treat you to something.
00:49:37 #741 Let it.
00:49:39 #742 All right, all right.
00:49:40 #743 I'll let you go out and wash the dishes.
00:49:44 #744 What do we say?
00:49:54 #745 Good evening, Mike.
00:49:54 #746 Hello.
00:50:00 #747 Where's your husband?
00:50:02 #748 Oh, well, he just stepped out for a minute.
00:50:05 #749 He shouldn't leave you alone like this.
00:50:07 #750 Well, he had to go on business.
00:50:08 #751 Oh, oh.
00:50:15 #752 What a nice cozy place you have here.
00:50:19 #753 Tom's a lucky boy, man.
00:50:20 #754 Yeah.
00:50:21 #755 Thank you, Mr. Uncle Claude.
00:50:24 #756 You've been a fine influence to Tom.
00:50:27 #757 Oh, that's very nice of you.
00:50:29 #758 And don't think I don't appreciate it, my dear.
00:50:34 #759 And when Uncle Claude says that he appreciates anything,
00:50:38 #760 He pays for it.
00:50:40 #761 There, my dear.
00:50:41 #762 For me?
00:50:42 #763 Yeah, for you and your husband.
00:50:44 #764 Why, but I, uh, $50,000.
00:50:50 #765 I'll give this check to Tom as soon as he comes home.
00:50:53 #766 All right, all right.
00:50:56 #767 What's that noise?
00:50:58 #768 Oh, the people next door are having a party.
00:51:01 #769 That terrible woman?
00:51:03 #770 You should have all the rest in quiet
00:51:05 #771 that you possibly can get, dear.
00:51:08 #772 Yeah, and by golly, you're going to have it too.
00:51:11 #773 Where's the telephone?
00:51:12 #774 Why, what are you going to do?
00:51:13 #775 I'm going to stop that terrible noise.
00:51:15 #776 You don't suppose that I'm going to allow a woman like that
00:51:18 #777 to jeopardize your health and your well-being?
00:51:21 #778 At a time like this?
00:51:23 #779 I should say not.
00:51:25 #780 I'll have the whole lot of them in jail.
00:51:27 #781 Get me the police station.
00:51:34 #782 Sad of their departure.
00:51:41 #783 By doing what appeals to everyone.
00:51:45 #784 And that is...
00:51:47 #785 Clowning!
00:51:49 #786 That's the way to save a party when it's drowning.
00:51:53 #787 Pull a lot of monkey business, go completely off your lid.
00:52:00 #788 And the bill's the ass-y up the minute that it cools.
00:52:18 #789 They forget their rincey ways and act like dog-gone fools.
00:52:22 #790 You is astounding, though it wouldn't go in France.
00:52:33 #791 And it ain't not a chance, not the proper thing to do here is to kick them in the pants.
00:52:39 #792 Clowning!
00:52:42 #793 It's Uncle Sammy's antidote for frowning.
00:52:47 #794 And it's diplomatic circles.
00:52:49 #795 And it's big affairs of state.
00:52:51 #796 When congressmen and senators can't get the issues right,
00:52:54 #797 they get their heads together and they sing.
00:52:58 #798 Sweet as...
00:53:00 #799 And they're breaking every law of the Constitution,
00:53:46 #800 including all of the amendments.
00:53:48 #801 So hurry.
00:53:50 #802 Yeah.
00:53:51 #803 Isn't that Tom's voice?
00:54:10 #804 Oh, I don't think so.
00:54:12 #805 That's Tom's voice.
00:54:17 #806 The rascal telling you that he's got to work
00:54:20 #807 and going in there to her home.
00:54:21 #808 I'm ashamed of it.
00:54:23 #809 No nephew of mine can treat a wife like you like that.
00:54:27 #810 No, sir. I'll get him.
00:54:29 #811 I'll drag him here and I'll make him confess everything.
00:54:32 #812 I'll show him that he can't treat you like that.
00:54:35 #813 You know, the time like this, my dear.
00:54:36 #814 But I go on now.
00:54:37 #815 All right, all right, all right. Now where's my hat?
00:54:39 #816 What are you doing here with that?
00:55:18 #817 Oh, how do you do, Mr. Davis? How are you?
00:55:21 #818 Don't do that.
00:55:22 #819 I don't like it.
00:55:23 #820 Hello, hello, hello there.
00:55:24 #821 I'm Robert Sincrew.
00:55:25 #822 Put it there, boy.
00:55:26 #823 You go away.
00:55:27 #824 Go away.
00:55:28 #825 I don't like your place.
00:55:29 #826 So do I.
00:55:30 #827 Here.
00:55:33 #828 Come back here.
00:55:35 #829 You're a couple of bad girls, and I ought to have you put in a reform school.
00:55:36 #830 But we haven't done any harm.
00:55:37 #831 We haven't.
00:55:38 #832 Oh, shut up.
00:55:39 #833 I'll have you deport.
00:55:40 #834 Look here.
00:55:41 #835 You two get your things done.
00:55:42 #836 Here.
00:55:44 #837 Come back here.
00:55:47 #838 What are you doing in this terrible place?
00:55:50 #839 I just came over to borrow a dictionary.
00:55:53 #840 Ah.
00:55:54 #841 You are going to be ashamed of yourself lying to your wife.
00:55:57 #842 Why, you ought to be ashamed of yourself, Mr. Robbins.
00:56:00 #843 You leave my house immediately.
00:56:02 #844 Yes, go right home, Tom.
00:56:03 #845 And you must stay, Mr. Davis.
00:56:05 #846 We'll get a lot of laughs.
00:56:06 #847 What?
00:56:07 #848 I mean, you will get a lot of laughs.
00:56:08 #849 In your house?
00:56:09 #850 I wouldn't take all of you down to your house.
00:56:11 #851 Hey!
00:56:14 #852 The stickers are copped for free!
00:56:30 #853 I'm glad you dropped in the seeds, officer.
00:56:41 #854 They're right, huh?
00:56:43 #855 Disordly, huh?
00:56:45 #856 Disturbing the peace, huh?
00:56:47 #857 Huh?
00:56:50 #858 Uh-huh.
00:56:51 #859 Hey, now look here.
00:56:54 #860 Now you shut up.
00:56:56 #861 It's old words like you that demoralize the youth of our country.
00:57:00 #862 Who lives here?
00:57:02 #863 I do.
00:57:03 #864 Where'd this come from?
00:57:07 #865 Come here.
00:57:08 #866 You...
00:57:09 #867 Hey, look here.
00:57:10 #868 You take your dirty hands off me.
00:57:12 #869 You can't arrest me.
00:57:13 #870 I am Claude Davis, president of the International Pet...
00:57:17 #871 And I'm the Queen of the May. Come on.
00:57:20 #872 Here. You can't arrest that old gentleman. He wasn't here. He wasn't.
00:57:24 #873 He wasn't? I suppose he isn't here now.
00:57:28 #874 You tell it to the judge. He just prayed for listening to lies.
00:57:32 #875 Come on, boys. Take him along.
00:57:34 #876 You can't arrest me. I've got an appointment for a facial tomorrow.
00:57:38 #877 So's your Aunt Emma.
00:57:39 #878 All my Aunt Emma wouldn't know what a facial was.
00:57:42 #879 This way.
00:57:43 #880 Oh, you make me sick.
00:57:44 #881 Come on, you.
00:57:45 #882 But obviously, I don't belong here.
00:57:47 #883 No, I know you.
00:57:48 #884 You've been making to talk for the past half hour,
00:57:56 #885 kindly tell the court what you were doing at this bar.
00:57:59 #886 Are you a singer, too?
00:58:01 #887 No, Your Honor, I am not a singer.
00:58:04 #888 I am Claude Davies, President of the International Tomato
00:58:07 #889 Catcher Company.
00:58:08 #890 Will you tell the truth about this,
00:58:10 #891 or will you go to jail?
00:58:11 #892 Your Honor, this may seem a bit strange to you,
00:58:14 #893 but we traded husbands and wives for a week.
00:58:16 #894 You did what?
00:58:18 #895 I am really married to Tommy Robbins,
00:58:20 #896 and she is really married to Harry Miller.
00:58:23 #897 Both boys got tired of their own wives.
00:58:25 #898 Look here, Tom Robbins,
00:58:26 #899 do you mean to say that you are married to this staff?
00:58:29 #900 One moment, sir. Another remark like that,
00:58:32 #901 and you'll go to jail for a month.
00:58:33 #902 But my dear judge, you bitch!
00:58:36 #903 That's all there is to it.
00:58:37 #904 Tommy preferred grace to me,
00:58:39 #905 and Harry preferred me to grace so we swam.
00:58:41 #906 Yeah, and your honor, I got no bargain.
00:58:43 #907 I regret it, so do I.
00:58:44 #908 No one's repressing more than I do.
00:58:46 #909 And I want Tommy back.
00:58:48 #910 He's not very much to look at, Judge,
00:58:50 #911 but he does lend atmosphere in the home.
00:58:52 #912 He lends more sphere than atmos, but I like it.
00:58:55 #913 Well, if I understand this situation correctly,
00:58:59 #914 all parties to this astonishing and illegal exchange
00:59:04 #915 sincerely regret it and desire to return
00:59:07 #916 to their respective husbands and wives.
00:59:09 #917 Will you repeat that, Judge?
00:59:11 #918 Judge, my pal.
00:59:12 #919 Hell, I'd rather live with Scarlet Thever than with this woman.
00:59:16 #920 Me too, only I'll take town salitis.
00:59:18 #921 Then I'd rather eat rat poison than live with that Mrs. Miller.
00:59:21 #922 Do you eat those words?
00:59:23 #923 He'll eat anything he can get near his mouth.
00:59:26 #924 And that's so big he can't miss it.
00:59:28 #925 Oh, and to think I was going to give you a big check.
00:59:34 #926 Very well, then.
00:59:35 #927 I command that each one of you return immediately
00:59:38 #928 to his husband or wife.
00:59:41 #929 And to ensure good conduct in the future,
00:59:44 #930 I parole each husband to each wife,
00:59:46 #931 and each wife to each husband.
00:59:49 #932 Your Honor, may I ask my nephew a question?
00:59:53 #933 Yes.
00:59:54 #934 Tom, how about my future grand-neve,
00:59:58 #935 or grand-niece, or whatever it was going to be?
01:00:02 #936 Answer the gentleman's question.
01:00:04 #937 Well, well, you see, Mr. Davis, your Honor,
01:00:08 #938 that little sweater I was knitting was for her tent.
01:00:11 #939 My dog.
01:00:12 #940 Oh, I just...
01:00:14 #941 How do you do, secret?
01:00:15 #942 Oh, I...
01:00:16 #943 Now Uncle Claude, don't you lose your...
01:00:18 #944 Now look here, ask for you.
01:00:19 #945 You will regret this to your dying day.
01:00:21 #946 You are a minister, society.
01:00:23 #947 Why the world would be best for David.
01:00:26 #948 My advice, you control your temper.
01:00:28 #949 But please...
01:00:29 #950 All in that case...
01:00:30 #951 Oh, dear...
01:00:32 #952 Oh my...
01:00:33 #953 Look and listen.
01:00:42 #954 You take your hands off of me.
01:00:43 #955 Aren't you satisfied?
01:00:45 #956 Ruining my reputation?
01:00:47 #957 Breaking my faith in mankind?
01:00:50 #958 Yes, and womankind too.
01:00:52 #959 But Uncle Claude, it's not as bad as you think.
01:00:54 #960 You haven't lost anything. I'm sorry.
01:00:56 #961 I'll give you back the check that you gave me.
01:00:58 #962 What?
01:01:00 #963 Hey, where'd you get that check?
01:01:02 #964 I never gave that check to you.
01:01:04 #965 I gave it to Tom.
01:01:05 #966 Well, it was made out to Mr. and Mrs. Tom Robbins,
01:01:08 #967 so naturally it wasn't mine.
01:01:10 #968 Yes, and good husbands always share everything
01:01:12 #969 with their wives.
01:01:14 #970 Uh-huh.
01:01:17 #971 The thing that you have taken from me that hurts more than anything else
01:01:21 #972 is the fond hope I had for a future grand-neve.
01:01:27 #973 Or a granny?
01:01:31 #974 If it wasn't for that, I might be able to forgive all of you.
01:01:38 #975 Uncle Claude.
01:01:39 #976 What do you want?
01:01:41 #977 It's everything.
01:02:13 #978 She can marry Joe.
01:02:15 #979 That's if she loves him 12 months hence, of course she will, I know.
01:02:19 #980 And Sally can have her parents to honor and obey.
01:02:22 #981 That's it for the year she still can stand to listen to her play.
01:02:26 #982 She gave Grace that...
01:02:45 #983 Ladies and gentlemen,
01:02:47 #984 Nesey's nephew and grandchild.
01:02:49 #985 And now, I have a surprise for Letty.
01:02:52 #986 I am taking Sally and Ruth abroad for an old year.
01:02:56 #987 And I want Letty to come with us.
01:02:58 #988 Oh, my!
01:03:02 #989 My facial surprise and lotion's in London.
01:03:07 #990 Oh, Uncle Claude, this is too much.
01:03:13 #991 Don't worry, darling. I will...