AI-made — please help correct faster-whisper small int8 + clean-pass
A machine made this from the film's audio. Names, old slang and songs are where it slips. If you spot a mistake, send the line number and the right words below — every correction makes the next transcript better.
Other tracks: en · AI-made — please help correct
00:00:00 #1 I've been waiting all night. 80 miles.
00:01:34 #2 That's all it is. Get out of my way!
00:01:36 #3 You're the man who's staying out. Stop!
00:01:38 #4 I won't talk.
00:01:52 #5 What noise? They're in the meeting. Keep quiet.
00:01:57 #6 Why is this commotion?
00:01:59 #7 Cousin Gregor! Cousin Beirut!
00:02:02 #8 This is my cousin. The mayor of the city.
00:02:04 #9 I'm sorry, uncle. It's me, and he tried to...
00:02:06 #10 Cousin Beirut, terrible things have happened.
00:02:08 #11 Come in here.
00:02:10 #12 Cousin Gregor! What has happened?
00:02:12 #13 I've been running all night. This is a disaster.
00:02:14 #14 I'm rude. Come and sit down. Fetch brandy and water.
00:02:16 #15 No water. No water.
00:02:17 #16 No water.
00:02:18 #17 Now what is it? What is it? Come on, speak up.
00:02:19 #18 What's happening?
00:02:20 #19 The flap of thunder he appeared among us. The postmaster was hanged.
00:02:23 #20 The chief of police was left off with 200 lashes.
00:02:25 #21 I was sentenced to the firing squad.
00:02:27 #22 Luckily my own firm made the rifles and they blew up. I escaped.
00:02:30 #23 I need a fresh horse. I must be off at once.
00:02:32 #24 A fresh horse for our cousins. Sit down. Sit down.
00:02:34 #25 But I must go. Even now he may be here in your midst.
00:02:37 #26 Who?
00:02:38 #27 Speak up, man. Who?
00:02:40 #28 The Inspector General.
00:02:42 #29 Yes. He has full power from the Emperor himself.
00:02:45 #30 And wherever he finds bribery and corruption,
00:02:46 #31 there the gallows in the firing squad go to work.
00:02:48 #32 More!
00:02:50 #33 What does he look like, this Inspector General?
00:02:53 #34 Who knows? A man of mystery.
00:02:54 #35 Five days he was in our midst and no one even suspected.
00:02:57 #36 He went heavyware, saw everything,
00:02:58 #37 and uncovered such corruption that even I was shocked.
00:03:00 #38 No, no, no, don't get excited.
00:03:02 #39 Don't get excited.
00:03:03 #40 How I envy you to sit here in your clean town and fear no one.
00:03:07 #41 The horse is running, Uncle Vera.
00:03:08 #42 I must be off.
00:03:09 #43 Oh, Gregor, where will you go?
00:03:11 #44 The way far away anywhere, Africa, China.
00:03:13 #45 Goodbye, Cousin Vera.
00:03:15 #46 Farewell, Uncle.
00:03:17 #47 Goodbye. Goodbye, Cousin.
00:03:23 #48 Do you need any money?
00:03:24 #49 You're very kind, Cousin Bero.
00:03:25 #50 I have a few crowns.
00:03:29 #51 Thank you.
00:03:30 #52 Farewell.
00:03:50 #53 I, uh...
00:03:51 #54 I would like to take this opportunity to tender my resignation. Effective...
00:03:55 #55 Sit down!
00:03:57 #56 What would you do?
00:03:58 #57 Go back to rolling pills and that stink-hole of a canvas shop?
00:04:01 #58 You... you poison me.
00:04:03 #59 Well, I... I promise.
00:04:05 #60 I've never been to the point where I've talked to my sister about something.
00:04:09 #61 There you are!
00:04:13 #62 Nothing's to be gained by rushing around blindly.
00:04:15 #63 We must proceed according to system.
00:04:17 #64 You, Ladswell, clean up the square.
00:04:19 #65 See that all the public buildings are spotless.
00:04:21 #66 For patients and all the hospital beds.
00:04:23 #67 Yes, Uncle.
00:04:24 #68 You, Teneche, get the children back into school.
00:04:26 #69 Start teaching them something, anything.
00:04:28 #70 Yes, Brother-in-law.
00:04:29 #71 You two deliver the mail, all of it, whether you read it or not.
00:04:32 #72 I never read any.
00:04:33 #73 Yes, you did, don't you remember?
00:04:34 #74 Hey!
00:04:35 #75 Goodbye, Uncle.
00:04:39 #76 Come back here.
00:04:42 #77 I want all roads, police day and night.
00:04:44 #78 I want a report of everyone who's entered this town in the past 24 hours.
00:04:47 #79 Check the cabin.
00:04:48 #80 Investigate all strangers. Well, I...
00:04:50 #81 And bring your reports to me personally. You understand?
00:04:52 #82 Yes, but first time would like to go.
00:04:54 #83 First you'll have the orders. I'll get out of here.
00:04:59 #84 Thank you, Captain.
00:05:11 #85 What a double guard at the city gates and patrol all roads to Broadley at once.
00:05:14 #86 What happened?
00:05:21 #87 Come with me.
00:05:22 #88 What goes to Dr. General?
00:05:23 #89 Shut up!
00:05:24 #90 I said come with me!
00:05:25 #91 Is anything wrong?
00:05:30 #92 Be quiet!
00:05:31 #93 Why you?
00:05:32 #94 I shall investigate here.
00:05:49 #95 You men go on to the next town.
00:05:51 #96 Step up, step up!
00:06:06 #97 Come close to me for the greatest experience of your life!
00:06:10 #98 You will tell your children and grandchildren about it!
00:06:13 #99 And first you will be entertained by the greatest musician in the country,
00:06:16 #100 direct from the court of the emperor!
00:06:19 #101 Yacht falls the Excerpt, the best we can be had.
00:06:22 #102 Yacht falls the Excerpt, it's good for what it's bad.
00:06:25 #103 Crime is the Excerpt, it's good for what it's bad.
00:06:28 #104 Buy this the Excerpt, it's best for what it's worth.
00:06:36 #105 Now good people step close to my rostrum that you may see all with your own eyes.
00:06:40 #106 I, Yakov Guri, physician to princes and crown heads have come among you
00:06:45 #107 to exhibit absolutely free of charge a wonder of the world,
00:06:49 #108 unparalleled since the dawn of time.
00:06:52 #109 Are you ready, my friends?
00:06:54 #110 The Egyptian marvel, the treasure of the pharaohs!
00:06:59 #111 Behold!
00:07:03 #112 Step right up, people, examine, observe.
00:07:05 #113 You there, who are you?
00:07:08 #114 Let me see your peddler's card.
00:07:09 #115 Here, Captain, Yaakov Guri, an honest professional man from Previous.
00:07:13 #116 I've touched him only from the emperor himself. I will prove it.
00:07:15 #117 Never mind.
00:07:17 #118 What about your friend there?
00:07:18 #119 Who, he?
00:07:19 #120 Oh.
00:07:22 #121 Don't ride away.
00:07:23 #122 Come back, come back.
00:07:25 #123 This exhibit welcomes any investigation.
00:07:27 #124 Look, my friends, it lives.
00:07:29 #125 It breathes.
00:07:31 #126 It laughs.
00:07:32 #127 It cries.
00:07:34 #128 It thinks.
00:07:36 #129 Watch it left ear.
00:07:37 #130 How much is two and two?
00:07:43 #131 This is not just an old head.
00:07:45 #132 This is Prince Ahmed of ancient Egypt.
00:07:48 #133 Beheaded by the cruel pharaoh
00:07:51 #134 because of his forbidden love for the crown princess.
00:07:54 #135 And now my friends you ask yourself,
00:07:56 #136 how did this miracle survive for over 2,000 years?
00:08:01 #137 An excellent question.
00:08:03 #138 Only this, Yakov's golden elixir.
00:08:07 #139 Look how his eyes plead with me to give him a dose of my elixir.
00:08:12 #140 He fairly yearns for his rich smooth goodness.
00:08:15 #141 Here, here, friend.
00:08:19 #142 I'm a simple man, my friends.
00:08:21 #143 I do not make extravagant claims for my medicine.
00:08:25 #144 If a person is already dead, for instance,
00:08:28 #145 there's only a slim chance that my medicine will do him any good.
00:08:32 #146 But if only a spark of life remains,
00:08:35 #147 Yakov's golden elixir will fan it into a roaring fire of health.
00:08:40 #148 How can Yakov cheat those poor people like that? Why, what's the matter?
00:08:56 #149 Well, this is the furniture policy sold yesterday.
00:08:58 #150 Come on, hurry up. He is almost through.
00:09:00 #151 Yeah. All right. Here we go.
00:09:01 #152 No, no, you don't wear this.
00:09:04 #153 This is a testimony for my grateful customers.
00:09:07 #154 Yes, even the great Napoleon himself.
00:09:10 #155 Written on the battlefield of Austerlitz.
00:09:12 #156 He gives the elector full credit for the victory.
00:09:15 #157 For years I have suffered terrible digestive distress.
00:09:19 #158 However, since taking Jakov's miraculous elector,
00:09:22 #159 I no longer find it necessary to continually hold my hand on my stomach.
00:09:27 #160 Kindest personal regard, Napoleon.
00:09:30 #161 John, Bob's an exer.
00:09:32 #162 Break it till you burst.
00:09:33 #163 Hey.
00:09:34 #164 John, Bob's an exer.
00:09:35 #165 This best for what is worth.
00:09:37 #166 Hey.
00:09:38 #167 But why do I tell you these things, my friends?
00:09:40 #168 When there is someone here, a sufferer on whom I've looked with compassion
00:09:45 #169 when he lay a desk, though, unable to move a muscle, paralyzed.
00:09:51 #170 Are you aware that you're losing your hair?
00:09:59 #171 Have you needed money?
00:10:02 #172 Have you been on a diet?
00:10:04 #173 Are you bothered by quiet?
00:10:06 #174 Eh?
00:10:07 #175 Quiet.
00:10:08 #176 Eh?
00:10:09 #177 Quiet!
00:10:10 #178 Nice dance, you little fella.
00:10:14 #179 Do you get colds of prickly heat,
00:10:18 #180 a burning brow of freezing feet,
00:10:19 #181 a leaping pulse and jumping toes,
00:10:20 #182 a falling arch or a running nose,
00:10:22 #183 and heaps...
00:10:24 #184 Do you get heaps?
00:10:26 #185 Cups.
00:10:27 #186 A touch of laryngitis,
00:10:28 #187 parenchitis, has more appendicitis.
00:10:30 #188 Heaps!
00:10:31 #189 Day does deal.
00:10:33 #190 Cups.
00:10:34 #191 Or A.B.'s heel?
00:10:36 #192 Day.
00:10:37 #193 Cups!
00:10:38 #194 Or measles.
00:10:39 #195 Have you had a diagnosis of cirrhosis,
00:10:41 #196 biasmosis with a mononucleosis,
00:10:43 #197 plus cirrhosis, plus the ptosis,
00:10:44 #198 plus paraclosis, upcycosis?
00:10:48 #199 Have you ever been short of breath?
00:10:51 #200 Well, chirrapa-pap-chirrapa-pap-chirrapa-pap-chirrapa-pap-
00:10:56 #201 No matter how bad your condition,
00:10:58 #202 I have news that particularly is...
00:11:00 #203 I was dead.
00:11:02 #204 Dead?
00:11:03 #205 Well, pretty sick.
00:11:06 #206 Till I saw a famous physician who hadn't seen a patient in years.
00:11:12 #207 He was nearsighted.
00:11:14 #208 He said, hello, young man, you are possibly the plumber.
00:11:18 #209 I'm a patient, Dr. Hummer.
00:11:21 #210 Dr. Hummer said, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm.
00:11:29 #211 Dr. Hammer said, hmm, better see Dr. Singer.
00:11:32 #212 Dr. Singer said, oh.
00:11:34 #213 You have a vehicle where the nose is and a barrel where the knee is.
00:11:46 #214 Tell me something, young man.
00:11:47 #215 You have had some diseases?
00:11:49 #216 Have I had?
00:11:50 #217 Oh, hey, hey, hey.
00:11:53 #218 When I was one, I had a.
00:11:57 #219 When I was two, I had a.
00:12:00 #220 When I was three, I had.
00:12:03 #221 By the time I was four.
00:12:07 #222 When I was six I had a...
00:12:10 #223 At seven I developed...
00:12:13 #224 When I was eight I got a...
00:12:16 #225 By the time I was nine...
00:12:23 #226 Dr. Why am I always so tired?
00:12:29 #227 Dr. Singer said,
00:12:30 #228 Ah, woo-hoo!
00:12:34 #229 And gave me the following prescription.
00:12:36 #230 Rix,
00:12:39 #231 Z-Gil...
00:12:42 #232 Knib...
00:12:44 #233 And...
00:12:45 #234 Zermen-Herzichler?
00:12:48 #235 Twice a day.
00:12:51 #236 Since that day I haven't been sick, sir.
00:12:53 #237 That medicine did it tricks her.
00:12:55 #238 And what was it?
00:12:56 #239 Don't ask me!
00:12:59 #240 Backups!
00:13:05 #241 Go hold...
00:13:25 #242 ...Tops elixir!
00:13:26 #243 My friends!
00:13:27 #244 Here you are!
00:13:28 #245 New fest!
00:13:29 #246 Here will give you new zest, new life, new enthusiasm. And what is it, Mother?
00:13:31 #247 I had well pennies.
00:13:32 #248 My husband is sick.
00:13:33 #249 If he had your medicine, maybe he would get well.
00:13:35 #250 Yeah, but go away, Mother.
00:13:36 #251 But please.
00:13:37 #252 One bottle right here.
00:13:38 #253 Will you take one here?
00:13:39 #254 No, no, please.
00:13:40 #255 No, Mother.
00:13:41 #256 Thank you, Mother.
00:13:42 #257 I'll handle her.
00:13:43 #258 Work the other side.
00:13:44 #259 Well, I did very well.
00:13:45 #260 No!
00:13:46 #261 Here you are, Mother.
00:13:48 #262 Bless you.
00:13:49 #263 Whatever's wrong with your husband, he's now cured.
00:13:51 #264 All right, ladies and gentlemen, here it is.
00:13:52 #265 The most wonderful, the most miraculous, all cure.
00:13:55 #266 Golden elixir.
00:13:57 #267 Mother, here are your pennies.
00:13:58 #268 Give me back my medicine.
00:13:59 #269 Mother, the medicine is no good.
00:14:01 #270 What's going on, my husband?
00:14:02 #271 He needs it, he's sick.
00:14:03 #272 I know, if this will finish him off here, take the pennies and put him in milk.
00:14:06 #273 It'll do much more good than the medicine.
00:14:07 #274 The medicine is no good.
00:14:08 #275 You said...
00:14:09 #276 Don't you remember me?
00:14:10 #277 I'm the fellow who had all the diseases and everything, but there's nothing wrong with me.
00:14:12 #278 This medicine is a fake.
00:14:13 #279 Yes, I'm a fake.
00:14:14 #280 Yakov's a fake.
00:14:15 #281 This is no good.
00:14:16 #282 I tell you, mother, we're cheating all the people, don't you see?
00:14:18 #283 They wash windows with it, furniture polish.
00:14:20 #284 All the people...
00:14:21 #285 Pardon me.
00:14:22 #286 All the people back there...
00:14:23 #287 Georgie.
00:14:24 #288 Yakov, we can...
00:15:05 #289 Georgie!
00:15:06 #290 Go for the fish!
00:16:02 #291 Jackoff, we can have supper now.
00:16:04 #292 We'll put it near the flame.
00:16:06 #293 It's my fish, Jackoff.
00:16:07 #294 It's mine now.
00:16:08 #295 I know, but I caught it.
00:16:09 #296 I took it.
00:16:10 #297 When you've learned a little more about taking it,
00:16:11 #298 less about giving it, you can come back.
00:16:13 #299 Get out.
00:16:14 #300 Oh, look, Jackoff, I'm sorry about that poor old woman
00:16:16 #301 showing her...
00:16:17 #302 Oh, poor old blinks.
00:16:18 #303 They said a payment he turns to puff cheese.
00:16:20 #304 In this life, it's doggy dog.
00:16:21 #305 Right.
00:16:22 #306 Bite and scratch.
00:16:23 #307 Grab everything for yourself.
00:16:24 #308 I told her I'm like a leech.
00:16:25 #309 But she can't even paint a pocket.
00:16:27 #310 And her husband?
00:16:28 #311 Yes, I can so too do it.
00:16:30 #312 I'm a good thief, Yakov.
00:16:31 #313 Even better than you.
00:16:32 #314 See?
00:16:33 #315 That's my watch!
00:16:35 #316 When did you get it?
00:16:37 #317 Oh, in the water.
00:16:38 #318 Please, Yakov, don't set me away.
00:16:39 #319 I'll do anything you want.
00:16:40 #320 I'll be as hard as nails.
00:16:41 #321 My heart will turn to stone.
00:16:42 #322 Please, Yakov.
00:16:43 #323 I'll fill my own mother's teeth.
00:16:45 #324 I'll believe it when I see it.
00:16:46 #325 Get out.
00:16:47 #326 What?
00:16:48 #327 Get out!
00:16:49 #328 Oh, all right.
00:16:50 #329 I'll go.
00:16:51 #330 Right after supper.
00:16:53 #331 You get out of here!
00:16:54 #332 Get out of here!
00:16:55 #333 It's my fish!
00:16:56 #334 I'm throwing you out!
00:16:58 #335 Why, you illiterate numbskull!
00:17:00 #336 I'm not illiterate!
00:17:01 #337 You're not, eh?
00:17:02 #338 All right.
00:17:04 #339 Read that.
00:17:05 #340 Come on, read it.
00:17:07 #341 Read it?
00:17:11 #342 Yes, read it.
00:17:12 #343 Who can read on an empty stomach?
00:17:15 #344 Read it and I'll give you supper.
00:17:17 #345 You will?
00:17:18 #346 Oh, that's different.
00:17:19 #347 It says...
00:17:20 #348 Oh, this is very interesting.
00:17:22 #349 Your handwriting shows definite character.
00:17:24 #350 It shows your generous, wooden, refused food to hungry men.
00:17:27 #351 Read it.
00:17:31 #352 It says, dear sir, it's as to whom it may concern.
00:17:35 #353 That's right. I was testing you.
00:17:37 #354 You were testing me.
00:17:39 #355 It's whom it may concern.
00:17:46 #356 Best personal regards in Napoleon. See?
00:17:49 #357 There you are.
00:17:52 #358 Well, maybe I can't read it right, but I'm not illiterate you're nothing just a meal stone
00:18:03 #359 What a silly way to
00:19:36 #360 Sandwiches
00:20:14 #361 What do you want
00:20:17 #362 I thought perhaps you men wouldn't mind sharing a little of the food with...
00:20:22 #363 On your way, Tramp. We hardly got enough for ourselves. Come on, get on your way.
00:20:26 #364 Well, you just gave a little piece to the dog.
00:20:32 #365 The dog does something for his food.
00:20:34 #366 I want to tell you, go on. Go away.
00:20:36 #367 If I could just have a little piece...
00:20:54 #368 Wait a minute. Art'll come here.
00:20:57 #369 Roll over. Can you do that?
00:21:02 #370 There's not good way.
00:21:04 #371 Can you do that? Go away. Can you do that?
00:21:07 #372 Roll over?
00:21:08 #373 Let's see you do it once.
00:21:12 #374 Hurry up.
00:21:14 #375 Or light down, light down.
00:21:16 #376 Wait a minute.
00:21:17 #377 Ha.
00:21:18 #378 That's me.
00:21:20 #379 Wait a minute.
00:21:22 #380 I bet he can run faster than you can.
00:21:24 #381 Ha.
00:21:45 #382 Thanks, Otto.
00:21:46 #383 You wanted fair and square.
00:21:48 #384 Bargain's a bum.
00:21:49 #385 If you haven't had anything to eat in the morning, please go back.
00:23:43 #386 Who, me? Oh, who do you?
00:23:52 #387 You've got the wrong person.
00:23:53 #388 Yes, and the horse followed me asking my medicine.
00:23:55 #389 I didn't know.
00:23:56 #390 You should go to hang with the clear conscience.
00:23:57 #391 Take him to jail.
00:23:58 #392 Go for it.
00:24:13 #393 Or is it easy?
00:24:14 #394 Can I never get that?
00:24:15 #395 Here's a concoct.
00:24:16 #396 I'm easy.
00:24:17 #397 You can always tell by the strawberry, Mark.
00:24:18 #398 Oh, never mind.
00:24:19 #399 The hospital, have you cleaned it up?
00:24:21 #400 Oh, you can eat off the floor as we put sheets on the bed, and we got the goats
00:24:24 #401 out of surgery.
00:24:25 #402 And I put charts on the foot of each patient's bed, indicating the nature of their illness.
00:24:28 #403 Good.
00:24:29 #404 Now, at least they'll know what they die from.
00:24:30 #405 Well, I've patrolled all the roads leading to and from Broadney.
00:24:33 #406 Soilton, unless the Inspector General disguises himself as a burden, decides to fly into the city.
00:24:38 #407 He'll never get past me.
00:24:40 #408 Good. And the jail.
00:24:42 #409 When I've had new locks fitted to all the cells, burnt the rubbish.
00:24:45 #410 I even have a prisoner.
00:24:47 #411 Good. Who is he?
00:24:49 #412 Oh, I don't know. Just a tramp.
00:24:51 #413 I apprehended him in the city square.
00:24:53 #414 He was trying to make off with a horse and wagon, the one we were loading with silver.
00:24:56 #415 My silver? My valuables?
00:24:59 #416 Well, yes, but I got him before he...
00:25:01 #417 Who is he? Where did he come from?
00:25:03 #418 Oh, I don't know. Why? I never saw him before.
00:25:06 #419 He's just a common tramp, just in rags.
00:25:09 #420 Did you search him? Question him?
00:25:23 #421 Well, it was so near lunchtime.
00:25:25 #422 And he was just a common tramp.
00:25:28 #423 The Inspector General, oh, that's ridiculous.
00:25:35 #424 Why not a tramp?
00:25:37 #425 In Vanceburg he first appeared as the traveling cheerleader.
00:25:39 #426 In Clemente he was disguised as a peddler.
00:25:41 #427 a pillar and here I was away my horse and like it the way and I loaded with valuables
00:25:47 #428 to ship out of town because of course the evidence he needed now he knows I would
00:25:53 #429 like to take this opportunity to tender my resume my tail office once some water
00:26:21 #430 water I want some food I'm sorry the prisoners are fed promptly at three o'clock
00:26:27 #431 Oh, well, I guess I can hold out till then.
00:26:31 #432 Wednesday and Saturday.
00:26:34 #433 Wednesday.
00:26:36 #434 But today is Thursday.
00:26:37 #435 What is time?
00:26:40 #436 I haven't eaten in two days.
00:26:42 #437 What kind of a jail is this where they won't even
00:26:45 #438 give a man a crust of bread all I want is a little piece of food?
00:26:49 #439 This is a nice jail.
00:26:51 #440 Really it is.
00:26:52 #441 We've had some wonderful hangings here.
00:26:55 #442 Oh, that's very nice.
00:26:56 #443 What's wonderful about the hangy?
00:26:58 #444 Oh, you should see the ceremony and the last meal.
00:27:02 #445 The last meal? Yes.
00:27:05 #446 Can you order anything you like? Anything.
00:27:07 #447 The town of Brogne may have its faults,
00:27:09 #448 but they certainly do it right when they hang a man.
00:27:11 #449 They do?
00:27:12 #450 The mayor and all the commissioners come
00:27:14 #451 dressed in their finest clothes
00:27:16 #452 and the town band assembles at the door of the jail.
00:27:19 #453 Such beautiful music.
00:27:21 #454 And they play the prisoner right up to the gallows.
00:27:24 #455 I never forget one hanging we had a few years ago. What's that? It was what?
00:27:30 #456 What's that music? It might be your rest for nothing. I'm menacing
00:27:47 #457 Commissioners and everybody and they brought the band the band
00:27:51 #458 Who who they gonna hang? Yep, and then there's only one prisoner here. Oh
00:27:58 #459 If he doesn't finish his last meal
00:28:07 #460 You let me out of here. You let me out of jail. Do you hear?
00:28:09 #461 Or I'll go right to the emperor. Help! Help!
00:28:12 #462 What a fine crooked village this must be.
00:28:14 #463 Thieves you must have here. Help! Let me out of here.
00:28:17 #464 Help! Help! Thieves you must have here.
00:28:22 #465 How did he put me in this jail? Let help!
00:28:24 #466 Open that gate. Open the gate.
00:28:25 #467 No trial, no justice. I will report this to the emperor.
00:28:30 #468 I... there's the crooked village this is.
00:28:32 #469 I... I... don't you anybody come near me.
00:28:34 #470 Don't you come near me. If any of you come near me,
00:28:37 #471 You can go back to Mancheville at least.
00:28:39 #472 There's others.
00:28:40 #473 I'm in the cell.
00:28:41 #474 May I please explain?
00:28:42 #475 If you've been put to any inconvenience,
00:28:45 #476 I assure you my colleagues and myself are extremely distressed.
00:28:49 #477 Ours is a small community, not rich or powerful, but...
00:28:54 #478 But citizens or travelers,
00:29:03 #479 may they humble or exalted to the highest degree of nobility,
00:29:06 #480 may they vaporize or inspector generals appointed by the emperor.
00:29:09 #481 In our village they find courtesy, honor,
00:29:11 #482 and strict adherence to the principles of justice.
00:29:14 #483 Remind us your excellency, and we will obey.
00:29:25 #484 Believe me, Your Highness, I understand in value your desire to remain incognito.
00:29:30 #485 Permit me to compliment you on your amazing disguise.
00:29:33 #486 It's most convincing.
00:29:35 #487 In a corrupt city with dishonest officials,
00:29:38 #488 such a strategy would be most effective.
00:29:40 #489 But here, we're not fair in the nature of broadening.
00:29:43 #490 We beg you to accept our hospitality.
00:29:46 #491 Why don't we discuss the entire situation at dinner?
00:29:49 #492 Ah, yes, uh, Bernice, go to my house.
00:29:51 #493 Tell my wife we have an honored guest.
00:29:53 #494 Tell her I want a feast, a banquet.
00:29:55 #495 Your Excellency, how can we talk?
00:29:57 #496 We soared in surroundings.
00:29:58 #497 At my home dinner would be just about ready.
00:30:00 #498 A roast, a turkey, several kinds of game,
00:30:03 #499 a rack of lamb, a magnificent pot roast.
00:30:06 #500 And you probably will want a change of clothes,
00:30:08 #501 uh, bring some suitable clothing for his Excellency.
00:30:10 #502 Where will I get the clothing?
00:30:11 #503 Uh, your uniform. Take it off.
00:30:12 #504 Now? Your Excellency.
00:30:15 #505 Yes, uh, yes.
00:30:16 #506 Our chief of police regrets his mistake.
00:30:18 #507 He will be delighted to have you wear his uniform
00:30:20 #508 until your luggage arrives.
00:30:21 #509 Colette will be honored.
00:30:22 #510 Burby's tall, isn't he? I know he is.
00:30:24 #511 Is he going to stay long?
00:30:26 #512 I hope not.
00:30:27 #513 What's taking you so long? Hurry!
00:30:28 #514 But I can't get it. It's too tight.
00:30:30 #515 Too tight indeed.
00:30:31 #516 I wonder if the inspector general
00:30:32 #517 think it's too tight.
00:30:33 #518 Tell me did you notice the color of his eyes?
00:30:35 #519 Are they blue? Are they brown?
00:30:36 #520 Yes. Yes.
00:30:37 #521 It's like I...
00:30:38 #522 Yes.
00:30:39 #523 What are you staring at, stupid?
00:30:40 #524 Get busy, set the table.
00:30:41 #525 And you two, listen.
00:30:43 #526 When you serve, see that your hands are clean.
00:30:45 #527 You'll remove the dishes when I ring.
00:30:47 #528 And you bring on the fresh course and move quickly
00:30:50 #529 and see that you don't spill anything on our guests.
00:30:52 #530 Did you hear me?
00:30:54 #531 What did I say?
00:30:55 #532 I take it, Bola Putsch. When?
00:30:57 #533 When you ring the bell.
00:30:59 #534 All right. And, Lisa, you help serve the wine
00:31:01 #535 and do anything else you can to make yourself useful.
00:31:03 #536 Come, Burbis.
00:31:07 #537 Oh, beautiful, so beautiful!
00:31:09 #538 That dress was too tight.
00:31:11 #539 So tight it made our eyes pop out.
00:31:20 #540 This is my humble home, Your Excellency.
00:31:22 #541 It isn't large, but I've only a small pittance of a salary.
00:31:26 #542 Knees to rest.
00:31:27 #543 My jewel! Maria!
00:31:35 #544 Maria!
00:31:36 #545 Your Excellency, and this is my wife, Maria.
00:31:41 #546 His Excellency, the Inspector General.
00:31:43 #547 Please, privilege your Excellency.
00:31:45 #548 May our visit here be pleasurable.
00:31:46 #549 Welcome your Excellency.
00:31:47 #550 Your hat, Your Excellency, and your sword.
00:31:49 #551 O'Bella!
00:31:51 #552 Your Excellency, my wife, Captain.
00:31:52 #553 Your Excellency, this is the pleasure of this place.
00:31:55 #554 I've got last night.
00:31:57 #555 I must get rid of him.
00:31:58 #556 I'll give him credit.
00:31:59 #557 Anything to stop me inspecting.
00:32:00 #558 You get the glasses.
00:32:02 #559 A toast to your excellency.
00:32:03 #560 There's something to prepare your palate.
00:32:05 #561 A toast to his excellency.
00:32:07 #562 I'll see about the dinner.
00:32:08 #563 Dinner?
00:32:10 #564 Why, yes, sir.
00:32:11 #565 I said, yes, sir. This is right. This is right here. I'm sorry.
00:32:14 #566 I wasn't going to tell you. Yes, sir. I'm sorry. Come on.
00:32:16 #567 Bring it back on, please.
00:32:17 #568 I'm sorry. My thanks.
00:32:19 #569 A toast to his excellency.
00:32:21 #570 Long live his excellency.
00:32:24 #571 I'm sorry.
00:32:27 #572 Laszlo, quickly.
00:32:28 #573 Come on. Wait up. The brandy.
00:32:30 #574 Quickly.
00:32:31 #575 Come on, please, please.
00:32:33 #576 Quickly.
00:32:34 #577 More brandy, be long.
00:32:35 #578 Now, Your Excellency, how charming it is for us to have...
00:32:38 #579 May I present Mrs. Bergus, Your Excellency.
00:32:40 #580 She's the wife of our tax collector and chemist.
00:32:43 #581 Now, here we are, Your Excellency, a little more wide.
00:32:47 #582 And a toast to His Majesty the Emperor.
00:32:50 #583 Long live the Emperor!
00:32:52 #584 Woo!
00:32:53 #585 Your Excellency, this is this...
00:33:01 #586 This fling brother and give it.
00:33:02 #587 They're in charge of our postal department
00:33:04 #588 at the Inspector General Izzyk.
00:33:06 #589 I'm not a dick, he's gizzick.
00:33:08 #590 Oh, it's very easy to tell by the strawberry mark.
00:33:10 #591 No, no, no, no, no, no, some other time.
00:33:11 #592 One more aperitif just before dinner.
00:33:14 #593 Dinner is served.
00:33:15 #594 Ah, dinner is served, Jack.
00:33:16 #595 One last big, your excellency.
00:33:18 #596 A toast.
00:33:19 #597 Here's to the righteous.
00:33:21 #598 For the righteous.
00:33:23 #599 Here's to the illiterate. Switzerland.
00:34:08 #600 I have relatives there in Barl, the Berghafs.
00:34:12 #601 Did you have a run across them?
00:34:14 #602 Your uniform is beautiful.
00:34:15 #603 My husband has one just like it.
00:34:17 #604 I do hope you're not disappointed in the simple fare we serve here.
00:34:22 #605 Ladies and gentlemen, I would like to propose a toast
00:34:27 #606 to the fairest city in all the land,
00:34:29 #607 to the home of courage, integrity and honesty.
00:34:32 #608 To Brodney.
00:34:36 #609 How are you?
00:34:47 #610 I don't suppose your excellency would have found it comparable to the sumptuous table
00:34:52 #611 they set at the Emperor's Palace.
00:34:54 #612 Of course I do, which Bureau had given me a little more time.
00:34:57 #613 You know that?
00:34:58 #614 Ah!
00:35:01 #615 His Excellency's glass is empty.
00:35:03 #616 Oh, leave that wine for your Excellency.
00:35:06 #617 But Doctor has eaten.
00:35:10 #618 Perhaps she'll tell me about your life in Vienna.
00:35:13 #619 And...
00:35:15 #620 Oh, I'm so sorry, Your Excellency.
00:35:18 #621 I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to.
00:35:20 #622 That's just an accident.
00:35:22 #623 Why, you clumsy drunch!
00:35:25 #624 Oh, her head was nothing just merely an accident.
00:35:29 #625 I always spill wine over my suit.
00:35:31 #626 Oh, really?
00:35:32 #627 It was for she didn't mean it.
00:35:33 #628 It was just...
00:35:34 #629 I used to use the water.
00:35:35 #630 It was very good for the wool.
00:35:37 #631 It's just that she didn't mean it.
00:35:38 #632 Just an accident.
00:35:39 #633 It's nothing at all.
00:35:45 #634 She really didn't...
00:35:46 #635 Oh, great.
00:35:58 #636 Who passed it down?
00:36:15 #637 Who did pass it down?
00:36:17 #638 Who did pass it?
00:36:18 #639 This, this, and this.
00:36:20 #640 And this.
00:36:21 #641 There.
00:36:22 #642 Now we have...
00:36:23 #643 And this.
00:36:26 #644 Come on.
00:36:27 #645 Yes, my pleasure.
00:36:46 #646 This is your Excellency. I always carry it with me.
00:38:36 #647 I should like it less than milk before breakfast.
00:38:38 #648 That's right. How did I get here?
00:38:41 #649 We carried you up after dinner, Your Excellency.
00:38:43 #650 We undressed you. We?
00:38:45 #651 And you earned a very playful mood, Your Excellency.
00:38:49 #652 Ooh, what a naughty Inspector General.
00:38:52 #653 What?
00:38:57 #654 All right, all right.
00:38:58 #655 Good morning, Your Excellency.
00:39:01 #656 May I express the hope that you've spent a comfortable night?
00:39:05 #657 Uh, what time is it?
00:39:07 #658 It's just past nine.
00:39:09 #659 But you've ample time for a substantial breakfast
00:39:11 #660 before you start your tour of inspections.
00:39:12 #661 Is it about inspection?
00:39:14 #662 Yes, our program is 11 AM reception at the town hall,
00:39:17 #663 inspection of the guard of honor and the band concert,
00:39:19 #664 and at 11.30, a parade to the jail,
00:39:21 #665 and 12.15, public hanging, followed by... Hanging?
00:39:24 #666 Followed by lunch.
00:39:25 #667 This, uh, this hanging isn't anyone I know, is it?
00:39:29 #668 Oh, it's just some rascal out alert police arrested.
00:39:32 #669 The road was impersonating a police officer.
00:39:34 #670 Impersonating a...
00:39:36 #671 Yes, he made off with a sack of apples
00:39:38 #672 from a local fruit merchant.
00:39:39 #673 Yes, impersonating an officer who,
00:39:41 #674 Hanging is much too good for him.
00:39:43 #675 Of course. Now I realize your excellency wants to continue his journey as soon as possible.
00:39:47 #676 Yes, I must go immediately. I have no receptions, no...
00:39:51 #677 Your excellency, I'm brokenhearted. I was looking forward to inspecting your little village.
00:39:54 #678 Yes, it's a wonderful village. Finest village I've ever seen.
00:39:57 #679 But I'd be kind enough to say so in your official report.
00:39:59 #680 Yes, of course, but I must get dressed.
00:40:00 #681 Yes, of course. I'll assemble the villagers and the band to speed his excellency on his way.
00:40:05 #682 Where am I closed?
00:40:06 #683 Yes, closed. Convatched! The uniform!
00:40:08 #684 Well, it's barely saying I was having it cleaned.
00:40:11 #685 Well, then the fresh uniform for his excellency.
00:40:13 #686 Where will I get one for his excellency?
00:40:15 #687 Yours will do.
00:40:17 #688 This is brand new. This wouldn't fit his excellency.
00:40:19 #689 Give it to him. Take care of this.
00:40:21 #690 This will be tailored to your excellency.
00:40:23 #691 They can rectify that.
00:40:25 #692 Put his excellency in a half an hour.
00:40:27 #693 What do you want?
00:40:29 #694 Brother, I'm...
00:40:31 #695 A lot of people. What a pity you have to need.
00:42:35 #696 Well, I thought I might be coming soon.
00:42:38 #697 Might be coming back again soon.
00:42:40 #698 No, no, no, no, don't change your plans on our account.
00:42:42 #699 Quick, his excellency's horse!
00:42:44 #700 The Inspector General's horse!
00:42:50 #701 Send the horse back as soon as I...
00:42:52 #702 I give. Richard, help his excellency to mount.
00:42:54 #703 Your excellency, your excellency...
00:43:01 #704 Oh, your excellency...
00:43:03 #705 Great star of wisdom.
00:43:05 #706 Tiaco, exalted one, do not be angry with your devoted servant.
00:43:09 #707 I've hunted for you everywhere.
00:43:11 #708 Oh, forgive me, great master.
00:43:13 #709 Forgive me, bestow mercy on your unworthy servant.
00:43:15 #710 Where is he? Forgive me, you scum. I'll break you in half.
00:43:18 #711 No, big general. Master, be gentle.
00:43:21 #712 I'm the lowly servant of this great law, the Inspector General.
00:43:25 #713 You do my negligence, we were separated on the road.
00:43:27 #714 I was just leaving.
00:43:28 #715 Oh, I must speak to you first, master.
00:43:30 #716 The Emperor has sent you confidential instructions.
00:43:32 #717 A secret message. Please, may I?
00:43:34 #718 But he was just leaving.
00:43:36 #719 The Inspector General will decide that for himself.
00:43:39 #720 Please, may I have a healthy as well?
00:43:44 #721 What do you want?
00:43:45 #722 Yeah, you must have told me.
00:43:47 #723 So, Yakov, I'll never be able to get out of here.
00:43:48 #724 There's a lot of...
00:43:49 #725 Help me.
00:43:50 #726 Yakov, why did you stop me?
00:43:55 #727 I had a chance to get away.
00:43:56 #728 Now they're behind me.
00:43:57 #729 Why, you idiot?
00:43:58 #730 Why should they hang the inspector general?
00:44:00 #731 You've got to stay.
00:44:01 #732 They lay the whole town at your feet.
00:44:03 #733 I don't want the town.
00:44:04 #734 I've got everything I want.
00:44:05 #735 I just want to get out of here.
00:44:06 #736 Wait a minute.
00:44:07 #737 You've got everything you want.
00:44:08 #738 Yes.
00:44:09 #739 What have you got?
00:44:10 #740 I didn't let anything slip through my fingers.
00:44:11 #741 What have you got?
00:44:12 #742 I didn't scratch.
00:44:13 #743 Steal and take.
00:44:14 #744 Doggy dog.
00:44:15 #745 See?
00:44:16 #746 Spoon.
00:44:17 #747 Three spoons.
00:44:18 #748 leave this town all right go on run away I was right in the first place you haven't
00:44:23 #749 got an honest bone in your body promise I don't understand only a few days ago you
00:44:29 #750 kicked me out because you said I wasn't a good thing I kicked you out yes I got
00:44:33 #751 my heart into a little bit driving from the company and this is a race I guess
00:44:37 #752 once in your miserable life you have a chance really do some good talk so what
00:44:42 #753 happens you want to run like a rabbit to save your own shabby skin never a
00:44:46 #754 I thought of the people in the village.
00:44:48 #755 Nothing but selfishness.
00:44:49 #756 Oh, wait a minute.
00:44:50 #757 Oh, I'd crowd through every corner of this village.
00:44:53 #758 Georgie, what misery exists here?
00:44:55 #759 The mayor and his official tax the very life out of this town.
00:44:58 #760 And not content with that, they steal.
00:45:01 #761 35,000 crowns they collected from the little children
00:45:03 #762 and their poor parents to buy a pipe organ for the church.
00:45:06 #763 Then they trump up a cock and bull store
00:45:08 #764 that the organ was destroyed, but I know that they
00:45:10 #765 sold it in another town. No.
00:45:12 #766 Now, by tonight, we can make some pay
00:45:14 #767 35,000 crowns for protection.
00:45:15 #768 Then I buy back the organ, you present to the town,
00:45:18 #769 and we expose these rascals.
00:45:20 #770 May I become a wandering gypsy if I'm not telling the truth?
00:45:23 #771 But you are a wandering gypsy.
00:45:24 #772 That proves I'm telling the truth.
00:45:25 #773 Now to work, Georgie.
00:45:26 #774 The most important thing is that you may tell them the stand
00:45:28 #775 that you know how crooked they are.
00:45:30 #776 They'll shower you with gold.
00:45:31 #777 Hey, 35,000 crown, Jack, or do you think
00:45:34 #778 they'll give it to me just like that?
00:45:36 #779 They'll give you more.
00:45:37 #780 Never fails.
00:45:37 #781 It's even easier when you're an inspector general.
00:45:39 #782 But I don't know how to be an inspector general.
00:45:41 #783 Well, that's very simple.
00:45:42 #784 You have to behave like one.
00:45:43 #785 But how?
00:45:44 #786 Oh, how, why, what?
00:45:46 #787 Don't bother me with silly technicalities.
00:45:48 #788 You are the Inspector General, the big, strong firm.
00:45:58 #789 Gentlemen, I have good news for you.
00:46:00 #790 The Inspector General has decided to remain indefinitely.
00:46:04 #791 He demands an inspection of the financial affairs of Brodney,
00:46:07 #792 and he will meet with you at the town hall at 2 o'clock.
00:46:25 #793 Be big, be strong, be firm, says Jakov.
00:46:28 #794 But if it doesn't work, whose neck will they jerk?
00:46:31 #795 Who's blood will they knock off?
00:46:34 #796 Not Yarkov.
00:46:37 #797 Be an Inspector General.
00:46:43 #798 What does an Inspector General do?
00:46:45 #799 Inspect General?
00:46:47 #800 No.
00:46:49 #801 An Inspector General generally inspects.
00:46:52 #802 That is, they expect him to inspect generally
00:46:55 #803 if they're expecting an Inspector General.
00:46:58 #804 But an exceptionally generous Inspector General who made
00:47:01 #805 an exception and had no inspection would cause suspicion,
00:47:03 #806 which in my condition I couldn't accept.
00:47:05 #807 Thank you.
00:47:07 #808 However, if people unsuspecting now except without detecting an imposter who's not posted as a pedigree inspector
00:47:14 #809 Could this palpable imposter say egypt's eota costa could he possibly get passed them by his posture in two words?
00:47:22 #810 unlikely
00:47:23 #811 So it is not a question of too flee or not to flee
00:47:33 #812 But to be or not to be
00:47:37 #813 And if so
00:47:39 #814 How?
00:47:41 #815 Be elegant.
00:47:44 #816 Should I be elegant?
00:47:46 #817 Should I be smart?
00:47:49 #818 A low-ring Russian hosard?
00:47:51 #819 A very British empire.
00:47:53 #820 Or like the KGB and these
00:47:55 #821 Who already eats a cheese
00:47:57 #822 While he says no thank you please
00:47:59 #823 Be smart.
00:48:02 #824 I must examine every side of me
00:48:05 #825 The long, the narrow, the wide of me
00:48:09 #826 The doctor jacqueline the hide of me
00:48:16 #827 If I value my anatomy, the skinny and the fat of me
00:48:20 #828 How shall I start to play the part?
00:48:24 #829 Should I be arrogant?
00:48:33 #830 Appearance!
00:48:34 #831 Elegant?
00:48:41 #832 Alum?
00:48:43 #833 Lemon?
00:48:47 #834 A dribble?
00:48:53 #835 Tea.
00:48:55 #836 Never touch it?
00:48:56 #837 Oh smart, if they don't know what you should know, they won't know what you would know.
00:49:04 #838 Irrigant!
00:49:05 #839 Illegant? Smart! If you see, sir...
00:49:09 #840 And it's not so!
00:49:10 #841 So much so!
00:49:12 #842 If you talk to them, yatta-tapa, you oily with your breed.
00:49:16 #843 Laugh at them, ha, ha, ha, they're all you far beneath.
00:49:21 #844 Oh, can you show your ignorance? Laugh when you show your teeth!
00:49:27 #845 Ah! Ah!
00:49:30 #846 Gentlemen, if you will just have us hired for one moment,
00:49:33 #847 I should be very happy to talk to this unfortunate wretch.
00:49:36 #848 Thank you.
00:49:43 #849 The course of action you should act on that I've actually planned is a smasher.
00:49:47 #850 A lot of thought I put in it.
00:49:49 #851 If you casually cover up your mouth with your hem,
00:49:53 #852 you will never put your foot in it.
00:49:58 #853 I'll never, never put my foot in it.
00:50:01 #854 Really gentlemen, please sneak a sniff in of snuff.
00:50:13 #855 Unsalve your difficulties with ease.
00:50:17 #856 Just stand around and wait for them to sneeze.
00:50:21 #857 Hey, no, it's a...
00:50:24 #858 Then, um...
00:50:27 #859 Take, take, take, mood.
00:50:34 #860 And you'll see which way will blow the breeze.
00:50:38 #861 Pay attention to what he says to what my way.
00:50:46 #862 Can you show your ignorance?
00:50:49 #863 I'll make it up to you.
00:50:51 #864 Never, never, never lose a bullet in it.
00:50:55 #865 Never, never lose a bullet in it.
00:50:57 #866 Bring it, bring it, bring it.
00:51:11 #867 You're so pleased with yourself.
00:51:15 #868 You don't care about me.
00:51:19 #869 Let it in through.
00:51:34 #870 They're not as bad as they look, jeepsy boy.
00:51:37 #871 Ta-ta-ta-ta.
00:51:38 #872 No, sir.
00:51:40 #873 They are much worse.
00:51:45 #874 Here in the eye is war through in the bush.
00:51:48 #875 Yeah, sir.
00:51:49 #876 Then it is high.
00:51:58 #877 Three or three of me, you need no longer linger.
00:52:07 #878 I'll give them the fist.
00:52:08 #879 Give them the fist.
00:52:09 #880 Give them the wrist.
00:52:11 #881 Give them the finger.
00:52:13 #882 Are you account for this? Well?
00:53:57 #883 Well, uh, there were no taxes that day, excellency.
00:54:04 #884 Would you put your official signature to the book?
00:54:09 #885 What is it? Very best.
00:54:11 #886 We have your excellency.
00:54:12 #887 We're not a very rich community.
00:54:14 #888 We're not trying this until I've, uh...
00:54:47 #889 You can examine the books more closely at the house.
00:54:49 #890 Your excellency.
00:54:51 #891 An excellency idea.
00:54:59 #892 We shall see.
00:55:01 #893 What we shall see.
00:55:06 #894 All I saw was this merry-scent show.
00:55:08 #895 The fat Gypsy was selling this stuff and his partner.
00:55:11 #896 That is, head on a plane.
00:55:14 #897 Yuck, or that soldier...
00:55:15 #898 That's his ex-hunter Inspector General.
00:55:17 #899 Seven, eight.
00:55:18 #900 This is the kitchen, isn't it?
00:55:19 #901 Now tell me, is there another way out?
00:55:21 #902 You're excellent.
00:55:25 #903 Oh, I have to.
00:55:26 #904 I can't stay another minute that...
00:55:41 #905 There's another town I have to inspect.
01:00:05 #906 Now, right now.
01:00:27 #907 People are waiting.
01:00:32 #908 How do I get out?
01:00:33 #909 I can't believe it.
01:00:35 #910 You can't believe what?
01:00:36 #911 You can't believe I have another town to inspect?
01:00:37 #912 Of course I do, Your Highness.
01:00:39 #913 Well, please don't be angry with me.
01:00:41 #914 Well, it wasn't angry.
01:00:42 #915 I...
01:00:43 #916 I don't know what to do.
01:00:48 #917 angry I you were so kind last night I thought you would stay and it gave me new
01:00:53 #918 hope but the whole village is looking to you for help yes well I thought perhaps
01:00:58 #919 on my way back I know your ex-law says plundering and misery it's terrible but
01:01:03 #920 you should see this other town it's it's they need me very badly of people
01:01:08 #921 awaiting receptions and I see I really mustn't disappoint them I'm well I'd
01:01:18 #922 I better be going.
01:01:20 #923 I'm sorry it won't be more friendly.
01:01:29 #924 Friendly? Why should I be friendly?
01:01:32 #925 I don't care if I hang for what I'm going to say what I think.
01:01:34 #926 Yours bad as the rest of them.
01:01:36 #927 Worse, because you have the power to do good and you run away.
01:01:39 #928 I'll stay.
01:01:41 #929 I can get the organ back. It didn't burn. I know where it is.
01:01:44 #930 Well then you do care about the people.
01:01:46 #931 Of course I do.
01:01:47 #932 Well the whole town will be so happy.
01:01:49 #933 I want you to be happy, Lisa.
01:01:51 #934 Well I don't count your excellency.
01:01:53 #935 I'm just a kitchen maid and I'll always be one.
01:01:56 #936 Well, that's no way to look at life.
01:01:59 #937 Things can change overnight.
01:02:01 #938 After all, I wasn't born an inspector general.
01:02:07 #939 Just happened.
01:02:08 #940 Come on, smile.
01:02:09 #941 Oh, the golden happy time is in the heart of a bluebird.
01:02:45 #942 And you'll find happy time.
01:02:51 #943 Though things may look very dark,
01:02:55 #944 Your dream is not in vain
01:02:59 #945 For when do you find a rainbow
01:03:02 #946 Only after rain
01:03:07 #947 Turn the moon and someday it may be tomorrow
01:03:14 #948 You will suddenly hear child
01:03:28 #949 Happy
01:03:37 #950 Good morning
01:03:39 #951 Here, action
01:03:41 #952 Madam?
01:03:42 #953 Just look what I found in the broadening library
01:03:45 #954 Crankley's new almanac of the Emperor's official staff.
01:03:49 #955 Emperor's official staff?
01:03:51 #956 With histories of their families and portraits by celebrated artists.
01:03:55 #957 Oh, the portraits are very bad. They're very bad.
01:03:58 #958 You wouldn't recognize the one of me.
01:04:00 #959 Oh, it's so hard.
01:04:02 #960 I thought only women were vain about their portraits. No.
01:04:06 #961 Now I've got to see how bad they make you look.
01:04:08 #962 You know you never even told me your name. Her name?
01:04:11 #963 It doesn't matter. No matter.
01:04:12 #964 How soon recognize you, then I'll find out all about you
01:04:15 #965 Your beautiful wife and lovely children.
01:04:17 #966 Oh, I have no wife.
01:04:19 #967 None of my family had wives.
01:04:20 #968 My father didn't like wives.
01:04:22 #969 I mean, my mother didn't like my father's wives.
01:04:25 #970 May I have the...
01:04:26 #971 Oh, this looks rather like you, but older, of course.
01:04:30 #972 Is it relative of yours?
01:04:31 #973 Oh, yes, it's my father.
01:04:32 #974 Your father?
01:04:33 #975 Madam Kanabi, wife of the second and sixth-in-a-kanabi,
01:04:37 #976 age 46, mother of 12 boys.
01:04:39 #977 Oh, that was a disguise.
01:04:42 #978 My father was a spy in the war,
01:04:44 #979 and he always used to disguise himself as my mother. Your father.
01:04:47 #980 No, no, my mother.
01:04:49 #981 I was 19 before I could tell him apart.
01:04:52 #982 Knobby, is that your family name?
01:04:54 #983 Yes, Farfow Knobby.
01:04:57 #984 Farfow?
01:04:58 #985 Oh, what an unusual name.
01:04:59 #986 Isn't it?
01:05:00 #987 It sounds like the morning breeze is
01:05:03 #988 rustling through the leaves and the willows.
01:05:05 #989 What does it mean?
01:05:07 #990 Well, uh, oh, I've had some kind of soup, I think.
01:05:13 #991 Oh, yes. Where were you born?
01:05:17 #992 Well, I... I have a book and I'll tell you all about it.
01:05:21 #993 Yes, some night when we're all over now. Perhaps tonight.
01:05:25 #994 Oh, I want to hear everything, Farthor.
01:05:28 #995 You don't know how I yearn to live.
01:05:30 #996 What it means to be married to a man who doesn't understand me.
01:05:33 #997 He's a peasant, of course, uncultured pig of a man.
01:05:36 #998 Yes, I was forced to marry him.
01:05:38 #999 I'm an attractive woman, am I not?
01:05:40 #1000 I'm still in the first bloom of my youth, am I not? Yes, but...
01:05:43 #1001 How desirable am I now? Yes, but...
01:05:45 #1002 Could a man wish for a more lovely, intelligent, responsive woman than I am?
01:05:50 #1003 No.
01:05:51 #1004 Oh, Farthal, you say the most beautiful thing.
01:05:55 #1005 Oh, well, I really must be going, top-sales.
01:06:00 #1006 You will help me, Farthal, won't you? Promise?
01:06:03 #1007 Yes, I... I promise.
01:06:05 #1008 When we get to Paris, I won't be a burden to you. I swear.
01:06:20 #1009 Forgive me. May I have a word with your Excellency?
01:06:23 #1010 What do you want?
01:06:24 #1011 I throw myself on your mercy.
01:06:26 #1012 Please, Your Excellency, for the sake of my family.
01:06:28 #1013 What is it? What have you done?
01:06:29 #1014 The tax records. It wasn't my idea to falsify them.
01:06:31 #1015 They may are my own uncle.
01:06:33 #1016 And to leaky old days of virtue for you.
01:06:35 #1017 Now, I admit I take bribes, but what kind of bribes?
01:06:38 #1018 Puppy dogs. That's all. Just little puppy dogs.
01:06:40 #1019 Oh, a kind of puppy dogs.
01:06:41 #1020 Oh, all kind.
01:06:41 #1021 Oh, I like puppy dogs.
01:06:43 #1022 Oh, you do? And you shall have them, Your Excellency.
01:06:44 #1023 Oh, forgive me. Yes, all 60 of them.
01:06:47 #1024 And here, here's just a little gift
01:06:49 #1025 to show you how much...
01:06:51 #1026 Your Excellency, who is it?
01:06:53 #1027 It is I, Tlecky, superintendent of the school here. Oh!
01:06:56 #1028 You mustn't find me here.
01:06:57 #1029 Oh, well, he's just a member of the council of the student.
01:06:59 #1030 Doesn't matter.
01:07:02 #1031 Come in.
01:07:05 #1032 Your Excellency, if I may have a moment of your time,
01:07:07 #1033 I have something with my interest to you.
01:07:10 #1034 There you see, I have the best interest
01:07:12 #1035 in the state of horror I would ever tell you this.
01:07:14 #1036 You understand this?
01:07:14 #1037 Well, I can't come to the point, Tlecky. I have to Tlecky.
01:07:17 #1038 Yes, to Tlecky.
01:07:18 #1039 Sometimes a man must decide between duty and friends.
01:07:20 #1040 And I feel it is my duty to advise you of the vice and corruption in the city of Broadney.
01:07:25 #1041 This isn't much, but if you will just accept it as a loan, if you like it will help, sir.
01:07:30 #1042 I see you're normal, Your Excellency. It is Gizzy, the false master.
01:07:34 #1043 Gizzy, he hates me. If he should find me here...
01:07:44 #1044 Did I come in?
01:07:51 #1045 I'm a poor man, Your Excellency. Please accept all this.
01:07:54 #1046 That's all I have.
01:07:55 #1047 The temptation was too strong.
01:07:57 #1048 The others stole more than I did.
01:07:58 #1049 They did?
01:08:00 #1050 Who is that?
01:08:01 #1051 Come with me.
01:08:02 #1052 Take a hide in the closet here.
01:08:10 #1053 Inspector General. Yes?
01:08:12 #1054 The rest of you, I want to thank you.
01:08:13 #1055 In fact, I must thank you.
01:08:16 #1056 My uniform looks very nice on you.
01:08:18 #1057 Thank you.
01:08:19 #1058 Well, I'm having one made in black with silver across here.
01:08:22 #1059 What is it, Comad?
01:08:24 #1060 I guess I might as well make a clean breast to it.
01:08:26 #1061 Won't you sit down?
01:08:27 #1062 Yes, thank you. You see, it wasn't for me.
01:08:29 #1063 It was for my wife. My wife is not a contented woman.
01:08:32 #1064 She wants clothing and money and jewels.
01:08:34 #1065 Oh, I love my family, but I'd give my six kids to get rid of my wife.
01:08:37 #1066 So... there's only a thousand crowns in here.
01:08:40 #1067 A thousand crowns?
01:08:42 #1068 Yeah. If you'll just give me a chance to sell the jewels.
01:08:45 #1069 Don't you... sit down.
01:08:47 #1070 Oh!
01:09:09 #1071 You're rusting your excellences?
01:09:28 #1072 Oh, I always raise. The doctor says it's good for my liver.
01:09:31 #1073 Maybe I better come back.
01:09:33 #1074 No, it's all right. What is it you want?
01:09:35 #1075 I just wanted to make a confession.
01:09:37 #1076 I'll take it.
01:09:38 #1077 Well, come down.
01:09:39 #1078 Thomas Yelly is a russ.
01:09:40 #1079 Remember, I...
01:09:41 #1080 Oh, I mustn't be found here.
01:09:42 #1081 Why don't I hide?
01:09:43 #1082 On the bed?
01:09:44 #1083 You're not?
01:09:45 #1084 Well, I'm in the chair.
01:09:46 #1085 Oh, no.
01:09:47 #1086 Go under the bed.
01:09:48 #1087 I said go under the bed.
01:09:49 #1088 On top of the bed.
01:09:51 #1089 I'm in the chair.
01:09:52 #1090 Come in.
01:09:58 #1091 We'll have to put our money here.
01:10:02 #1092 Has the message come from the emperor?
01:10:04 #1093 What?
01:10:05 #1094 Go downstairs and see if my luggage has arrived.
01:10:08 #1095 What's the matter with you?
01:10:09 #1096 What's the weather outside?
01:10:10 #1097 Look, I don't know.
01:10:11 #1098 There's a lot of people hiding in there.
01:10:15 #1099 The council members, they came with the bribes.
01:10:18 #1100 The bribes?
01:10:19 #1101 Money?
01:10:23 #1102 Where is it?
01:10:24 #1103 It's...
01:10:25 #1104 Come in.
01:10:33 #1105 Your ex-execution may ask you for a moment.
01:10:35 #1106 Yes, of course.
01:10:37 #1107 Privately.
01:10:38 #1108 They all brought the money.
01:10:50 #1109 You're wrong.
01:10:52 #1110 Yes, Your Honor.
01:10:56 #1111 Oh, Mayor, and you too, Mr. Chief of Police.
01:10:58 #1112 Yes?
01:10:59 #1113 His Highness cannot tolerate this honesty.
01:11:01 #1114 No.
01:11:02 #1115 Then why did he accept the bribe?
01:11:03 #1116 A few measly crowns.
01:11:05 #1117 His Excellency has many private charities.
01:11:07 #1118 I can assure you, another penny of that money will ever find its way into the pockets
01:11:11 #1119 of the Inspector General.
01:11:13 #1120 Well, what do you want us to do?
01:11:17 #1121 It's possible, Bear possibility, mind you, that few substantial contributions from
01:11:22 #1122 you might how much shall we say a hundred thousand crowns hundred thousand
01:11:29 #1123 crowns I'll be a pauper very well keep your money you can jingle it in your
01:11:33 #1124 pockets all the way up to steps to the gallows he wouldn't do anything like
01:11:36 #1125 that he would and he has but he might be inclined to show leniency if he can
01:11:41 #1126 realize the charitable dream of his life a much needed addition to the
01:11:45 #1127 The cathedral he built in Vienna.
01:11:48 #1128 A new church organ.
01:11:50 #1129 A fire proof organ.
01:11:54 #1130 He knows.
01:12:12 #1131 Who do it?
01:12:15 #1132 The old chopper.
01:12:16 #1133 You do as I tell him he has to.
01:12:18 #1134 I can get him tonight.
01:12:19 #1135 During the reception when all is confusion and noise.
01:12:22 #1136 But if something goes wrong, nothing will go wrong.
01:12:25 #1137 Are you sure?
01:12:26 #1138 Yes.
01:12:26 #1139 After midnight, as soon as everyone's had a pint of the drink,
01:12:29 #1140 one of us will get him into the barn where they tell the wood chopper's
01:12:31 #1141 waiting.
01:12:32 #1142 He will dispose of the barn.
01:12:33 #1143 Good.
01:13:01 #1144 What are you doing?
01:13:02 #1145 You think I want to steal it?
01:13:03 #1146 I want to count it.
01:13:04 #1147 Well, I've already counted it.
01:13:05 #1148 You can't count.
01:13:06 #1149 Well, it's very heavy.
01:13:07 #1150 There must be enough money here to buy back the organ.
01:13:09 #1151 All right.
01:13:10 #1152 Give it to me.
01:13:11 #1153 I'll go get the organ.
01:13:12 #1154 Oh, no, not without me.
01:13:13 #1155 Look, you can't leave here.
01:13:14 #1156 They need you for the reception.
01:13:15 #1157 Well, then we'll go after the reception.
01:13:16 #1158 Look, Yakov, there's an old Hungarian proverb.
01:13:19 #1159 Trust everybody, but keep the organ money in sight.
01:13:21 #1160 Love letter.
01:14:02 #1161 I scroll it.
01:14:03 #1162 Love letter.
01:14:04 #1163 Oh, you let me see that.
01:14:05 #1164 No, Yakov.
01:14:06 #1165 No, let me see that.
01:14:07 #1166 No, it's private, Yakov.
01:14:08 #1167 Never mind.
01:14:09 #1168 No, no.
01:14:10 #1169 Well, you read it to me, Jacob.
01:14:20 #1170 Oh, Georgie, you're such a lucky guy.
01:14:33 #1171 What is it?
01:14:34 #1172 I have a beautiful girl like that fall in love with you.
01:14:37 #1173 Read it to me, Jacob.
01:14:38 #1174 Please.
01:14:39 #1175 My dearest darling Inspector General, from the moment I first saw you, I knew you were the one.
01:14:45 #1176 At night I dream of your manly figure, and your handsome, gentle features drive me mad with passionate love.
01:14:52 #1177 I am mad with passionate love.
01:14:55 #1178 The sound of your voice thrills me beyond words.
01:14:57 #1179 And if I cannot have you for my very own, I must surely die.
01:15:04 #1180 Is there any more that she says anything else?
01:15:05 #1181 Yes, yes.
01:15:06 #1182 PS, please meet me in the barn at midnight.
01:15:10 #1183 Please meet me in the barn at midnight.
01:15:16 #1184 Yakov, what does PS mean?
01:15:18 #1185 PS.
01:15:21 #1186 Please sweetheart, please.
01:15:48 #1187 Waiting for our son.
01:15:49 #1188 Is this the carriage?
01:15:51 #1189 I'll meet you at the table after the dive.
01:15:53 #1190 Oh, yeah, Papa.
01:15:54 #1191 Are you going to...
01:15:55 #1192 Burn!
01:15:57 #1193 I have the money.
01:15:58 #1194 Does he send in his report?
01:15:59 #1195 Oh.
01:16:12 #1196 Tell him I'll deliver to him tonight.
01:16:13 #1197 Good.
01:16:14 #1198 And we can't settle the matter in here.
01:16:15 #1199 Where would you suggest?
01:16:16 #1200 Outside, in the barn.
01:16:17 #1201 At midnight?
01:16:19 #1202 He'll be there.
01:16:20 #1203 I'll go and get ready.
01:16:21 #1204 I'll see you later, Papa.
01:16:22 #1205 I got your note.
01:16:23 #1206 You're wonderful.
01:16:24 #1207 It's a barn.
01:16:29 #1208 A barn.
01:16:30 #1209 Franz Castine!
01:16:44 #1210 I'm going to take you to the hospital.
01:16:48 #1211 Friends, Christine.
01:17:11 #1212 Comrade, life-long friend of his excellency,
01:17:13 #1213 the Inspector General.
01:17:14 #1214 We've been friends for many, many years.
01:17:16 #1215 Yes, sir.
01:17:17 #1216 Announce me at once, young lady.
01:17:19 #1217 Yes, General?
01:17:20 #1218 Hmm?
01:17:21 #1219 Oh, young man.
01:17:22 #1220 Uh, trouble with your eyes, Honored Colonel?
01:17:24 #1221 Yes, yes.
01:17:25 #1222 I was snow-blinded in the Alps in the Italian campaign
01:17:27 #1223 with this Majesty, the Emperor.
01:17:29 #1224 The Emperor?
01:17:30 #1225 Long life to his Imperial Majesty, the Emperor.
01:17:32 #1226 Oh!
01:17:33 #1227 Oh, you idiot.
01:17:34 #1228 Where are...
01:17:35 #1229 Oh, there you are. You blithery idiot.
01:17:36 #1230 Now, where are my glasses? My glasses.
01:17:37 #1231 Oh, they fell down on the floor.
01:17:39 #1232 I'm sorry.
01:17:41 #1233 Be careful.
01:17:42 #1234 I'm sorry. Don't step on them.
01:17:44 #1235 No, I shall not. No! I am so.
01:17:46 #1236 Oh!
01:17:48 #1237 Oh, you stupid fool.
01:17:50 #1238 Now look.
01:17:51 #1239 I'll have to go and get another pair. No, no, no.
01:17:53 #1240 You just stay right here.
01:17:54 #1241 Hold on, Gary.
01:17:55 #1242 I shouldn't make the announcement.
01:17:56 #1243 Ladies and gentlemen, I have the honor to announce the unexpected arrival of Colonel
01:18:02 #1244 the French Castine of the Empress Royal Guards.
01:18:05 #1245 Comrade in arms and lifelong friend of his excellency,
01:18:09 #1246 the Inspector General.
01:18:10 #1247 Well, the Colonel is quite near,
01:18:17 #1248 so I didn't have the misfortune to break his glasses.
01:18:20 #1249 Imagine he broke his glasses.
01:18:21 #1250 Oh, no, Colonel, you're missing the wrong man.
01:18:24 #1251 This is the Inspector General.
01:18:25 #1252 Oh, of course, how stupid of me, yes,
01:18:27 #1253 the Inspector General is really a much shorter man.
01:18:31 #1254 Leopold, this is indeed a joy, a joy.
01:18:34 #1255 I noticed that you've, uh, you shaved your mustache.
01:18:37 #1256 Uh, my, my, oh, uh, uh, he used to tickle,
01:18:40 #1257 well, not me, that is.
01:18:41 #1258 It's all right, it's all right.
01:18:42 #1259 It makes you look much younger.
01:18:43 #1260 And your voice, it seemed to sound much more youthful.
01:18:45 #1261 Well, not always.
01:18:46 #1262 I, I, I, I try this.
01:18:48 #1263 My friends, this is the man who single-handed
01:18:51 #1264 routed an entire regiment of Italians
01:18:53 #1265 at the Battle of Levenghretto.
01:18:55 #1266 And then he pushed their own cannon into position
01:18:57 #1267 and fired at the retreating enemy.
01:18:59 #1268 Do you remember that, my boy?
01:19:00 #1269 Oh, nothing, you know.
01:19:01 #1270 And our stillits.
01:19:02 #1271 Oh, I didn't do much.
01:19:03 #1272 Oh, he didn't do much.
01:19:04 #1273 He just dove into a raging river and rescued
01:19:06 #1274 four wounded soldiers.
01:19:07 #1275 And then on the way, he cut down 10 spanners with his saber.
01:19:12 #1276 The morale was very low.
01:19:13 #1277 But with its magnificent courage, he plunged into the fray
01:19:17 #1278 and he led his men with a song.
01:19:19 #1279 The victory song of the 94th Regiment.
01:19:21 #1280 Onward, onward, never looking back.
01:19:25 #1281 How does it go, Leopold?
01:19:26 #1282 Yes, it doesn't like to be reminded of that magic date.
01:19:29 #1283 But he might be persuaded to sing something lighter,
01:19:31 #1284 a little more gay.
01:19:32 #1285 A little whiless.
01:19:33 #1286 I can't.
01:19:34 #1287 Oh, splendid, splendid.
01:19:35 #1288 Then I can get my glasses from here.
01:19:37 #1289 Oh, no, sir, no, sir.
01:19:38 #1290 Why don't you sing something now and another colonel
01:19:40 #1291 sing you in Brazil before he gets his glasses.
01:19:48 #1292 Could I borrow you a drink for the song, please?
01:19:53 #1293 And now?
01:19:55 #1294 And now I, for my friend and comrade in arms,
01:19:59 #1295 I'd like to do a gypsy, gypsy drinking song.
01:20:05 #1296 My wine, he took my wine.
01:20:09 #1297 He spent it all.
01:20:10 #1298 No, but one swallow and he said it would be a lot for him.
01:20:12 #1299 All your family's for.
01:20:13 #1300 The wine, it's deadly poison.
01:20:15 #1301 How is it?
01:20:16 #1302 You did.
01:20:17 #1303 Why, it was so thoughtful of you.
01:20:18 #1304 For years I'd misjudged your poison for it.
01:20:21 #1305 Oh no, no, no, it was for me.
01:20:22 #1306 For you?
01:20:23 #1307 Yes, I couldn't stand it any longer.
01:20:24 #1308 I even wrote a confession.
01:20:26 #1309 You what?
01:20:27 #1310 A confession?
01:20:28 #1311 Whisking through the whispering woods and a while,
01:20:48 #1312 the Romani pony with a yak-kak-yak-kani-yak-sadrak-kani-yak-sadrak-sadrak-sadroni
01:20:52 #1313 rides the gypsy.
01:20:54 #1314 The gypsies... The gy-
01:20:58 #1315 p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p.
01:21:02 #1316 The world thinks him gypsy
01:21:05 #1317 and careless and free,
01:21:08 #1318 but, oh, the poor gypsy
01:21:11 #1319 his love is numb,
01:21:18 #1320 water launched his hand
01:21:33 #1321 over gypsies. Said,
01:21:35 #1322 I'll give you advice and drink to hellos.
01:22:10 #1323 Go into the open, drink to the close.
01:22:12 #1324 Drink to me only with your eyes.
01:22:15 #1325 And I will drink with my nose.
01:22:20 #1326 And so we drink.
01:22:21 #1327 But first, we sing.
01:22:26 #1328 How can you sing gypsy song without gypsy chorus?
01:22:33 #1329 Ladies and gentlemen, I will ask you for a little favor.
01:22:35 #1330 You help me, we'll have a little chorus.
01:22:37 #1331 It'll sound beautiful, wonderful.
01:22:38 #1332 I will give you a little beat.
01:22:40 #1333 You make for me zoom, all right?
01:22:41 #1334 Please, everybody.
01:22:42 #1335 Zoom.
01:22:43 #1336 It's very nice, but we get a little sharper, you know.
01:22:46 #1337 More in the masquerade from her.
01:22:48 #1338 I'll be here. Zoom.
01:22:50 #1339 All right, please, all right? Zoom.
01:22:53 #1340 Very nice. Now short, eh? Zoom.
01:22:55 #1341 I like it. I like it.
01:22:57 #1342 One small, please, now. Zoom.
01:23:00 #1343 Very pretty. This grub here I will make for you stock, stock.
01:23:04 #1344 Please, everybody understand? Stock, stock, all right?
01:23:07 #1345 Stock, stock.
01:23:08 #1346 Very nice, all right?
01:23:09 #1347 Stock, stock.
01:23:10 #1348 No, I didn't make it yet!
01:23:14 #1349 Pat me, ladies and gentlemen, please, small stock stock.
01:23:17 #1350 Very nice.
01:23:19 #1351 That's so pretty.
01:23:22 #1352 I'll be with you in two minutes.
01:23:25 #1353 Now this little grout here, I'd like you to make a little favour on me.
01:23:28 #1354 All the little tiny pussycats, those sweet gentle little faces.
01:23:31 #1355 Make for me. Ha, ha, ha, this way, all right? Please, everybody.
01:23:34 #1356 Ha, ha, ha, ha, just wonderful.
01:23:37 #1357 Now, quickly, fast, we have set.
01:23:38 #1358 We have said everybody listen once again, please very pretty I love you to pieces, please
01:23:44 #1359 You want something to drink maybe?
01:24:31 #1360 No thank you excellency.
01:24:47 #1361 So we drink.
01:24:51 #1362 But first we play.
01:25:17 #1363 Pardon me, I slipped my bowl.
01:25:18 #1364 My fingers need a reason.
01:25:20 #1365 I'm to be a doll.
01:26:47 #1366 If you're enjoying the evening.
01:29:07 #1367 Yes, I uh.
01:29:08 #1368 What's the matter with you?
01:29:58 #1369 You're crazy?
01:29:59 #1370 You know, you could have killed me with that.
01:30:03 #1371 Why do you have to work so late at night anyway?
01:30:07 #1372 Whatever you have to chop can wait till morning, can it?
01:30:10 #1373 Now, go on a bed.
01:30:11 #1374 Go on, I've got to meet somebody here.
01:30:13 #1375 Go on a bed.
01:30:16 #1376 Won't you the inspector general?
01:30:17 #1377 Yeah.
01:30:19 #1378 That doesn't mean I can't meet anybody here, does it?
01:30:21 #1379 No.
01:30:23 #1380 You don't believe it, do you?
01:30:33 #1381 Going to kill you.
01:30:34 #1382 Only two hours ago, she said again, please.
01:30:45 #1383 She says, don't go near the barn.
01:30:48 #1384 They are going to kill you.
01:30:50 #1385 Here you go.
01:30:52 #1386 Uh, yeah.
01:30:56 #1387 Raise your monster.
01:31:17 #1388 Let's get out of business.
01:31:35 #1389 For a price, I'll get rid of the evidence. The money.
01:31:40 #1390 Cali Tarantino, his Excellency, the Inspector General.
01:34:14 #1391 The bribes?
01:34:36 #1392 He drank all my wine.
01:34:37 #1393 He yelled out the windows.
01:34:39 #1394 He even made love to my wife.
01:34:40 #1395 How could I doubt that he was an Inspector General?
01:34:42 #1396 I mean, he gave us no chance to think of deception,
01:34:45 #1397 your majesty.
01:34:46 #1398 I mean, your Excellency.
01:34:47 #1399 Isn't that right, Gizik?
01:34:48 #1400 And Gizik, he's Gizik.
01:34:49 #1401 He can always tell by the star remark on my leg.
01:34:52 #1402 What if it's as big as your...
01:35:00 #1403 I'm Gizik.
01:35:01 #1404 Here's Gizik.
01:35:02 #1405 Silence!
01:35:05 #1406 First of all, Mayor, I want that trend.
01:35:07 #1407 Send out every man available.
01:35:09 #1408 Yes, Sheriff.
01:35:10 #1409 Meanwhile, I will write out an order for his exclicitus.
01:35:13 #1410 Yes, Sheriff.
01:35:14 #1411 He will hang today, Sheriff.
01:35:16 #1412 I promise you that.
01:35:17 #1413 Test the gullum.
01:35:18 #1414 I am listening.
01:35:19 #1415 I never thought of seeing it.
01:35:31 #1416 The organ, the one that was stolen,
01:35:32 #1417 we gave him the money we had.
01:35:34 #1418 And now it's back.
01:35:36 #1419 I'll see you in a minute here.
01:35:37 #1420 Take the organ to the church.
01:35:38 #1421 I'll be back in a minute.
01:35:40 #1422 Here, there.
01:35:41 #1423 Come on, then.
01:35:42 #1424 I may need you.
01:35:48 #1425 Take three!
01:35:55 #1426 I'm glad I found all you gentlemen together.
01:35:57 #1427 This town is going to be cleaned up from top to bottom.
01:35:59 #1428 This is the inspector general.
01:36:01 #1429 Yes.
01:36:02 #1430 Mr. Mayor, I'd like you all to know that the corruption
01:36:04 #1431 in this city is at an end.
01:36:06 #1432 I want a complete and honest report from you
01:36:08 #1433 and a complete report of your tax records.
01:36:10 #1434 I want a report from you in the morning. Who is this man?
01:36:13 #1435 Tell him to get out.
01:36:14 #1436 This is official business.
01:36:15 #1437 Mr. Mayor, in the name of the emperor,
01:36:17 #1438 I call upon you to produce all the tax records
01:36:19 #1439 and books of this village immediately.
01:36:21 #1440 He will permit me to interrupt.
01:36:22 #1441 Let me show you this communication which has just
01:36:24 #1442 arrived.
01:36:38 #1443 Silly girl.
01:36:39 #1444 and out of business. I want to help you back up on this is the inspector general.
01:36:43 #1445 How do you do we must have a long talk together sometime I want to look at all
01:36:46 #1446 these books. Books.
01:36:58 #1447 Over the.
01:37:10 #1448 You regret this you fat face village.
01:37:13 #1449 How dare you dirty hands off me you misbegotten.
01:37:15 #1450 Tell him I'll.
01:37:16 #1451 The emperor will tear this stinking village down over your ears.
01:37:19 #1452 You seaving lad bucket.
01:37:21 #1453 Heads will roll here like marbles, yours first.
01:37:23 #1454 And then this leerid and sack of nothing.
01:37:26 #1455 You only inspect the general.
01:37:27 #1456 He didn't say anything.
01:37:28 #1457 Take him away.
01:37:30 #1458 Don't make me laugh.
01:37:31 #1459 The great emperor wouldn't appoint a thing like this
01:37:33 #1460 to a post of such importance.
01:37:35 #1461 This is your inspector general.
01:37:37 #1462 Here, his carriage, his manor, his bearing.
01:37:39 #1463 Gentlemen, take your choice.
01:37:40 #1464 I don't know what to think.
01:37:41 #1465 You don't have to think.
01:37:42 #1466 I think if this man doesn't inspect the general, then where is credentials?
01:37:45 #1467 No, where's yours?
01:37:46 #1468 Show them your excursions. They have a right to see.
01:37:48 #1469 Come on, show them. Show your credentials.
01:37:50 #1470 Show them...
01:37:51 #1471 Oh, uh...
01:37:53 #1472 Produce them.
01:37:54 #1473 Here they are.
01:37:56 #1474 See?
01:37:57 #1475 Oh, that's right.
01:37:58 #1476 I'll give you a...
01:37:59 #1477 All right. Yeah.
01:38:01 #1478 Your Excellency?
01:38:05 #1479 Corbett!
01:38:06 #1480 I would like to take this opportunity to tender my resignation.
01:38:15 #1481 I'm so sorry, Your Excellency.
01:38:16 #1482 It was an honest mistake.
01:38:18 #1483 The imposter will hang.
01:38:19 #1484 This is preposterous.
01:38:21 #1485 Your agency will be so good as to write out the death warrant.
01:38:24 #1486 Just one minute, please.
01:38:27 #1487 Arrest that man.
01:38:28 #1488 I'm warning you. I'm warning all of you.
01:38:29 #1489 This will be reported to the emperor. Lock him up.
01:38:31 #1490 This is an old place.
01:38:38 #1491 I can't do it.
01:38:40 #1492 Why not?
01:38:42 #1493 Oh, one thing I can't write.
01:38:44 #1494 Oh, I just...
01:38:46 #1495 I can't read it either.
01:38:47 #1496 And even if I could write, I couldn't sign this death warrant.
01:38:51 #1497 I'm...
01:38:54 #1498 I'm not the Inspector General.
01:38:56 #1499 Oh, he's just soft-hearted. Here, I'll sign.
01:38:58 #1500 You can't do it, yeah.
01:38:59 #1501 Oh, no, you can't.
01:39:00 #1502 It's all over.
01:39:01 #1503 I couldn't sign this, that...
01:39:04 #1504 Man is completely innocent. I...
01:39:06 #1505 Hang...
01:39:08 #1506 I only did it so I could get the money to buy the organ back. I...
01:39:12 #1507 I'll come over here and put them in chains. Send them to the gallows!
01:39:14 #1508 Oh, Your Excellency, I'm so sorry.
01:39:16 #1509 Oh, nothing like this has ever happened before, but I assure you they'll go to the gallows.
01:39:19 #1510 Your Excellency...
01:39:20 #1511 The gallows will wait at stern, but not now.
01:39:22 #1512 But your Excellency be...
01:39:24 #1513 This man will not hang.
01:39:26 #1514 Huh?
01:39:27 #1515 First honest man I've met since I left Budapest.
01:39:30 #1516 Whatever you say, your Excellency.
01:39:32 #1517 Here.
01:39:34 #1518 Let my chain of office your Excellency.
01:39:36 #1519 We'll put something else around your neck.
01:39:38 #1520 Oh, thank you, your Excellency.
01:39:39 #1521 With band music? What'd you say?
01:39:40 #1522 With band music?
01:39:43 #1523 Heh.
01:39:44 #1524 I...
01:39:45 #1525 I couldn't take this, your Excellency.
01:39:47 #1526 I...
01:39:48 #1527 I can't even read or write.
01:39:49 #1528 I have no education.
01:39:51 #1529 What you have is much better.
01:39:53 #1530 Please, I want to present you to my madam in my fashion.
01:39:59 #1531 This guy.
01:41:24 #1532 To this guy.
01:41:27 #1533 Rodney.